The Top Ten WORST Hit Songs of 2017

hiphopgod
Yo wassup guys, it's black Santa back at it again. This time bringing you all the big pop hi- I mean worst hits of 2017. I'm actually gonna try this time, because looking at my top 20 songs of 2017, I saw little effort and am pretty ashamed. Also, the Stankonia review is most likely not going to be out by the end of this month. Very disappointing, I know, but trust me, it'll be a Hat In Time instead of a No Man's Sky.

So what qualifies as a hit? Well, I say that it's any song that either A.) peaked in the top 20 from January 1st to December 31st or B.) Had a spot on the Billboard year-end hot 100. Also, this is my opinion, so if you get triggered, just know that I don't care one lick, okay? Thank you. Les go

10.) Body Like A Back Road - Sam Hunt
Starting off well aren't I? Well, this song sucks, no doubt about it. I just hate most country music in general. I think the main reason this song sucks is because how dumb it is. Like, it's not Lil Pump dumb (Gucci Gang is an honorable mention, but it's so dumb that I couldn't take it seriously) but it's still really dumb. Myc Unt really uses analogies really well here, he says his girlfriend is like a road that's old and beat up. It's prolly up there with "Sunburn is like getting an STD, no matter how much protection you use, you're still gonna get it." So what saves it from being higher? Well, I kinda like the beat, yeah, that's the only reason. Welcome to music hell my friends.

9.) Rake It Up - Yo Gotti feat. Nicki Minaj
This song is actually terrible. When I first heard it, I thought "welp, I think I got my number two worst song of 2017 (I'd already known what my number one was at that point, which it still is my number one worst)," As generic and bad as Yo Gotti is, we have to give it up for the real queen of total sucktitude, Nicki Minaj. So far, Nicki Minaj is like 1-4000 on a good verse to bad verse ratio. She can't rap. She rhymes china, what, 7 times? It's not even a good beat like BLABR, it practically doesn't exist it's so generic. Generic song with a generic beat and a generic meaning from a generic rapper with the worst rapper of all time.

8.) I'm The One - DJ Khaled feat. Justin Bieber, Chance the Rapper, and Lil Wayne
There's one good artist involved in this song. But yeah, I hate this song. I hate pretty much every Khaled song because he's just some guy who steals beats, yells over them, has someone else do all the work, and then take credit for it. Hell, even Chance isn't good in this song, your song has to really suck for that to happen. I have nothing else to say on this trash.

7.) What Lovers Do - Maroon 5 Adam Levine feat. SZA
Yeah, see what I did there? Because Maroon 5 is just the Adam Levine show at this point. The beat is trash, Adam's trash (what's new?) and worst of all, SZA's trash. I like SZA, she's got some talent, but working with Adam Levine took her career back 5 steps if you ask me. Perhaps the worst thing about this song is how catchy it is, but it's not the good catchy. It's like, you accidently start humming it and you get pissed that you started humming it. Trash song, trash singer, trash feature (sorry SZA)

6.) LOYALTY. - Kendrick Lamar feat. Rihanna
Oh boy. So DAMN. was pretty good. There was only one real stumble, and unfortunately it was a pretty big one. This is actually a theme on Kendrick albums, there's that one song that should've been a single, but a worse song was chosen over it. In GKMC there was Poetic Justice over Sing About Me, I'm Dying Of Thirst. In TPAB, it was These Walls over U. And in DAMN. it was LOYALTY. over DUCKWORTH. The main difference however, was that none of those other songs before this were bad, but this one suuuuucks. I've never heard Kendrick so bored on a song before, but here it is. Rihanna doesn't add anything either, you could literally replace her with anyone (including Kendrick) and had the same result. I'm sure this was just a small error, and it will be fixed soon.

5.) Thunder - Imagine Dragons
This is the worst Lorde song I've ever heard. Oh wait, no it's just a Lorde wannabe. Thunder is trash because it feels like ID isn't trying here. They're just making something weird for the hell of it, and it ended up sounding more normal than anything they've made before. A lot of people say Believer is worse, but I say Thunder takes the cake for imagining the worst possible dragon. It sucks because it's not natural, it's completely artificial. Unlike Radioactive, Demons, and Warriors, where they sound real and amazing, here they sound fake, board, and awful.

4.) Look What You Made Me Do - Taylor Swift
There are 3 songs worse than this, can you believe it Drew? Well, this song sucks. You've all heard why it sucks before, it's just Taylor being a diva and trying to be edgy. I hate it. But, there is one thing preventing this from being #1, and that's the production. It may suck, but at least it fits the dark theme of this song.

3.) I Don't Wanna Live Forever - Zayn & Taylor Swift
It's a song from 50 Shades of Gray, what'd you expect, it was gonna be good or something? No, it's trash. The main issue I have with it is surprisingly not Zayn, but T Swizzle herself. She sucks, as usual. But here, she actually had a better performance than Zayn because she's not a man who sounds like they lost their pair. But the reason she's the big issue is because by the time she comes in, I'm already done with the song because I've had to listen to Zayn for so long. It's like a tease, or a too good to be true situation. You know that game Heavy Rain? Where Ethan has to go through hellish trials to save his son? Well I feel like that when listening to this song.

2.) Bad At Love - Halsey
Let me just get this out of the way, I don't hate Halsey. I mean I hate her as a person, but her music isn't completely terrible. But this song is just her ranting about her past relationships for the entire song before screaming about how she's bad at love. We have our new Taylor Swift guys. Except Halsey's worse because unlike Taylor Swift, she's an awful person.

Honorable Mentions:
Gucci Gang - Lil Pump
Look At Me! - XXXTentacion
Sorry Not Sorry - Demi Lovato
Slow Hands - Niall Horan
Issues - Julia Michaels

and with all that through, my number one worst song of the year IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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1.) Tunnel Vision - Kodak Black
As I said before, I knew this was gonna be my number one since I first heard it in February. I may have said Halsey was an awful person, but hey, there's always worse. Why is Tunnel Vision my number one? Well, it sounds awful for one thing. Kodak has a voice that's only rivaled by scratching a chalkboard with a fork, and this flute beat thing is really getting old. But, there's something worse about this song. You see, Kodak Black is a piece of human trash. This song is a response to rape allegations sent Kodak's way, and if you listen to the original version, it says "I get any girl I want, I don't gotta rape," and when I heard that, I automatically knew this was my number one worst. Please, Kodak, stay in jail, and don't come back.

Well, that's the worst of the worst for this year. This may seem bad, but it was NUFFIN compared to last year. I could've made a top 50 of last year's stuff *wink* *wink* *nudge* *nudge* but, for now, I'm hiphopgod, and I'm gonna go drink some Root Beer because it's been a long day.

Comments

I actually like Maroon 5, but I respect your opinion. Anyways, this is good post.
Also, I think 2016 and 2017 were (or is. I don't know that correct word to use for that. lol) the worst years of music. - TheFourthWorld

Personally I've never understood the appeal for them, but I respect that people like them. I say that 2014 trumps all in terms of sucktitude though lol (except for Uptown Funk, that song was amazing) - hiphopgod

Maybe you'll understand once you hear their earlier works.
Also, Uptown Funk is too amazing to not like. - TheFourthWorld

I used to put What Lovers Do as a 3/10 until I found out I was trying my best to hate hit even though I really don't.

Horrible lyrics, but solid production.

Uptown Funk's amazing by the way - StarlightSpanks

In my opinion gucci gang is number 1 - BoyGenius234

Eh, I think Gucci Gang might be satire. After listening to "ESSKEETIT" it's hard not to think that all of Lil Pump's songs are just jokes. - hiphopgod

Awww, I liked Look at Me! - Not_A_Weeaboo

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