DCfnaf Movie Reviews: Justice League

DCfnaf Aaaand, We're Back to Square One

So...the DC Cinematic Universe.

This is the franchise that was behind three atrocities in a row; The snoozefest known as Man of Steel, the universally panned Batman V. Superman, and the absolutely awful trainwreck of a "film" that was Suicide Squad. I looked down upon all three of these films with hatred and questioned why this was the road the DCEU wanted to take.

But that’s when they fought to save their last shred of dignity by making Wonder Woman, a wonderful film that looked beautiful, had a pretty solid narrative, and had cleverly tossed in jokes that didn’t make me roll my eyes the whole way through like a certain Guardians of the Galaxy sequel did. But most importantly, it gave us all hope that maybe... just maybe...this series of films would take a positive shift in quality. In fact, I think Wonder Woman is a much better movie than every single one that Marvel has released this year, and that’s really saying something since Spider-Man: Homecoming was a really fun journey as well.

That’s when a good comrade of mine basically forced me to watch the trailer for Justice League, the latest DCEU movie. That trailer made me very, very, VERY worried. I was greeted with sloppy editing and abysmal visual effects, as well as what appeared to be a very cliche superhero narrative with nothing very notable to comment on. Also...it was directed by Zack Snyder.

The guy behind Man of Steel and Batman V. Superman.

At that point, I was convinced that this was going to be another abomination. But Wonder Woman did come out just a few months prior to this, and I really enjoyed that one, so I figured I’d be a little less harsh and not judge this film simply from the trailer.

So I went into the theater a tad worried, but I had my fingers crossed, praying that this would be another Wonder Woman and, hopefully, more than one DCEU film would actually be recommendable. And when I walked out of the theater as the movie concluded...I realized that there was something I really needed to work on...

Trusting my instincts.

I shouldn’t have went in thinking that there was going to be many redeeming qualities about this movie. I saw the trailer and knew what I was in for as I was repulsed by the horrendously edited clouds. And now that I’ve went in and had the same reaction, I just have one question to ask:

DC...what the hell are you doing?

No, seriously. What the ever-loving HELL are you doing?

Surprisingly enough, this is yet another atrocity from this awful, awful series of films, and I’m fully convinced that this is the level of quality we can expect from it consistently if they continue to do what they’re doing.

Justice League, set in a world where Superman is no longer living, tells a story where Batman (Ben Affleck) and Wonder Woman (Gal Gadot) work to find and recruit a team of heroes, consisting of Aquaman (Jason Momoa), Cyborg (Ray Fisher), and The Flash (Ezra Miller) to save the world from the tyranny of the evil villain (portrayed by Ciarán Hinds), Steppenwolf (which, by the way, is an absolutely godawful name for an antagonist).

Was this really the best thing they could’ve come up with? This the most typical story I’ve ever seen in a superhero film, and that’s really saying something since a lot of these movies are the epitome of uncreative. (At least those movies had other redeeming factors, unlike this garbage heap).

Like BvS and Suicide Squad before it, this movie makes the exact same mistakes with the story again. Three new characters are introduced to the roster; Cyborg, The Flash, and Aquaman, each of whom give us little tidbits of their backstories in order to make you believe the writers actually gave them depth. After that, they barely contribute anything to the narrative and they simply hop along for the ride just so the crew behind this mess can give it a title that it really doesn’t deserve. The Flash is one of the most excruciatingly awful characters that I’ve ever seen in a superhero film, and that’s really saying something. Absolutely none of his tryhard, witty jokes were funny in any capacity, and I spent the entire film praying that Batman would just smash his nose right in. Then there’s Cyborg, who proves that you can’t go way too far in the other direction as well by acting all angsty throughout, and yet he managed to be so forgettable and bland. The main antagonist, Steppenwolf (which is still an utterly ridiculous name) suffers from this same issue because not only doesn’t he have a very boring design, but his motivations and powers are very basic and don’t interest me in the slightest. Finally, we have Aquaman who might as well have just been completely removed entirely because he’s basically the Katana of this movie. He could’ve literally been removed from this whole damn movie and very little would’ve changed in terms of the story. During action sequences, he doesn’t even utilize any of his water superpowers, so I fail to see the point in having him here, which is a shame.

As a matter of fact, none of them should’ve been here. Each of them have solo movies coming out in the foreseeable future, and judging by how Wonder Woman turned out, it was completely pointless to churn this abomination out before all three of those movies.

Maybe doing that would've given them more time to make the final product look much better, because holy hell do these visuals look asinine. The visually unattractive clouds I mentioned earlier really did not look convincing at all, and that’s to blame on it’s faux red color. Of course, clouds aren’t actually meant to be red, but couldn’t they have at least made them look a little more realistically edited? This is also extremely noticeable whenever Steppenwolf teleports off of the screen as well as whenever The Flash to represent his speeding across the horizons as well as Steppenwolf's transportations. The lightning-esque visuals for each look completely fake and malnourished, and they could’ve done a much better job with them.

Credit where credit is due though, the intense battles throughout the film are quite great and are very entertaining in their own right. Unlike Suicide Squad, which bombarded me with some of the most dull, lifeless action sequences that I’ve ever seen in a superhero flick, these fights had color, energy, and, most importantly, appeal. I was hooked throughout the entire scene, which shows that they truly are taking baby steps in terms of improving their work. Even so, this is the only trait about this movie that I would even consider a redeeming one, and that’s still a major issue all on its own because there shouldn’t be only one reason to even bother watching this.

Final Thoughts/Recommendation

Serving as yet another atrocity in a franchise that’s been struggling to amaze the world, Justice League is a hot, steaming mess in literally every way. The action sequences may have had a sliver of entertainment factor within them, but literally everything else about it was completely horrendous. All of it was so lost in its own atrociousness that I was left with much more questions as opposed to answers this time around. What exactly was the point of making this if the story didn’t really do or tell anything? Why was the writing, especially every line delivered by The Flash, totally cringeworthy? Why was this movie released before giving us a longer, more proper introduction to The Flash, Cyborg, and Aquaman in their own individual movies, which are set to come out in the upcoming years? And seriously, why did the villain have such a godawful name? I don’t even care if that’s his name in the comics, it’s still a really idiotic name. I doubt we will ever know, but we do know one thing: I ain’t recommending this movie in a million years.

Thankfully, things might be looking up from here though. DC has actually decided to listen to the critics and is planning to have the series focus more on the individual characters and developing them rather than doing what they did for the past three movies (excluding Wonder Woman). It’s also going to split itself into two different narratives/universes, and I’m actually pretty interested to see what they come up with. So now I still have a sliver of hope for this this rotting corpse of a franchise that basically died once it started, and pray that things get better from here.

Because as far as I’m concerned, this is rock bottom.

3 -- Bad (DC's got some potential left with the upcoming films, and I'm rather interested to see what they come up with next. But that’s not going to change the fact that this movie absolutely blows. I will give this a 3/10 because the action was nice, but everything else was atrocious.)

🍅 Rotten Tomatoes Score: 40% from Critics, 79% of Audiences Liked It 🍅

💁🏻‍♂️ How I review movies: https://www.thetoptens.com/best-movies/56694.asp

🎥Next Movie Review🎥 : Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi

Comments

Screw the DC Cinematic Universe. - visitor (12/19/2017)

MCU sucks too. - B1ueNew (11/6/2018)

I didn’t hate the movie but there was definitely a lot of wasted potential. - MegaSoulhero (12/19/2017)

I doubt there was any that wasn’t wasted. :/ - DCfnaf (12/20/2017)

Affleck was playing tony stark/phil coulson
I want them to do a movie about Spectre, the angel from heaven that lunges in the body there go in to it.
Why is there no Martian Manhunter?
Why is there no Green Lantern?
Why don't they get the Injustice League instead of Stephhen Wolf? - RandomGuy1234 (12/20/2017)

That Green Lantern movie was complete garbage. Obviously DC is probably scared of using or mentioning GL in any of their future movies. - TristGamer (1/20/2018)

True but so was Transformers 2
So was X Men Orgrins Wolverine
So was Batman and Robin - RandomGuy1234 (4/1/2018)

Good review as always. Not that I really care for Justice League (2017), but DC should really try to step up their CGI. I remember hearing about how they edited out Superman's moustache for the actor and how it looks blatantly fake and cartoonish rather than realistic. - visitor (12/23/2017)

I honestly think Zack Snyder was the wrong choice for the DC films. He did 300 just fine, but that was really the only movie where his overblown CGI actually worked. I thought Wonder Woman was alright, as well. - visitor (1/20/2018)

He was good for Watchmen
But not this
I did like Watchmen thoug - RandomGuy1234 (4/1/2018)

Will you do a Jumanji review? - TristGamer (1/20/2018)

I want to review it SO BADLY, but this is midterm weekend and I have to prepare for a crappy presentation in Social Studies so I can't. :( - DCfnaf (1/21/2018)

Um... I pulled my d**k off while reading this. Help. - Skullkid755 (2/3/2018)

Warner bros thought that two hours was too long and that one director left so another came in and this was the fourth most expensive film of all time. I think it was to get Ben Affleck to be Batman considering this performance from him as he looked so excited. And there was a scene when it showed how useless the members were without Superman. The villain was ugly and was worse looking than Nicolas Cage as Ghost Rider combined with the fact that no character development took place. Cyborg espically could have been a phenomenal character but Warner Bros don't want that. I assume that the leader must be someone like Tim Burton to get back at them the unjustified firing he got after Batman Returns. - iliekpiez (6/2/2018)

Marry me! - visitor (8/8/2018)

This surely is Mike - iliekpiez (8/18/2018)

After how good Wonder Woman was. I thought this was going to be good. I was wrong. This movie sucked. Most DC movies suck. Most Marvel movies suck. Most superhero movies suck. - B1ueNew (11/6/2018)