Top Ten Worst Things to Hear Your Pilot SayFinch You're sitting in your economy 18B middle seat, sandwiched between two people who snore. Luckily the Fasten Seatbelt sign is turned off so you can squeeze your way into the aisle and head to the lavatory. You sit inside and revel in the freedom and space.
You only have a few hours left of your flight so you wander back to your seat when you hear the familiar dinging of the Fasten Seatbelt sign. You hear the pilot's voice come over the intercom and hear:
The Top Ten
Unless they start hiding parachutes under the seats, nobody wants to hear that their section of the plane might be landing early - and somewhere other than the airport. - Finch
That sucks because I always sit in coach - ethanmeinster
Ha! That is amazing! Lol - jmepa1234
While video games and flying a commercial plane are probably closer than you think, you should really hope for a seasoned pilot. - Finch
Please tell me it's goat simulator he played - cdxtreme
This made me giggle - jmepa1234
We hope to see nothing but blue skies, clouds, and the tops of mountains far below us. - Finch
I've never been this close to a mountain before... - PositronWildhawk
That's why blue skies are always nice. Unlike the mountains. - Kiteretsunu
We know those ten-minute catnaps happen, just don't advertise it to the passengers. - Finch
Sleeping during the flight... Is that why we are on Mars? - jmepa1234
Haha... Actually oh my God! That's not at all funny!
Great list, Finch! - Britgirl
Being airborne is definitely the objective when traveling by plane though sometimes it might be safer to be on the ground. - Finch
True! At least we aren't dead! - jmepa1234
Nobody ever thinks about the pilot's day. Maybe this is one of those days they don't want to see the end of. - Finch
Nothing like a laptop or iPhone hitting you in the back of your head at 500 mph - or the ground hitting you in the face at the same speed. - Finch
While planes can fly without one of their engines, losing multiples might not be the best thing for your trip. - Finch
If the person doesn't know the mechanics of a plane, they shouldn't be allowed to drive one. - BlueTopazIceVanilla
OK on jumbo jets - computerfan0
While waiting to board the plane, we all watch to see if we can spot our bags being loaded but who really watches the fuel crew? - Finch
This happened to my mom.
There is always such a disparity between the meals in different classes. Has anyone ever decided it was worth paying the extra cost just to get a slightly better meal on an airplane? Aren't the more comfortable seats, earlier boarding times, nicer staff, and better smelling air enough? - Finch
I must say, there is nothing like a hint of cannibalism to account for your metabolism. - PositronWildhawk
Come on mayday is terrifying to hear
They're about to land or in mid air, almost anything could be happening then there's a malfunction ie: Landing gears stuck in plane, Brace, Brace etc.
This joke is SERIOUSLY getting old. - Minecraftcrazy530
I'm Bored of this joke! *yawn* Snore... - jmepa1234
This was in the movie "airplane" and that movie was halarious - Ajkloth
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4 years, 154 days old
2. The normal pilot slept in so I'll be handling the flight today. Don't worry though, this is exactly like the simulator.
3. If you look out the left side of the plane you'll see bright blue skies. Those of you on the right side will see what looks like a mountain approaching rapidly...