Top 10 Foods that Make You Fart
The baked beans I had last night made me really gassy and it came in handy since it was fart in the sorority pledges face night. So it was time to go over and by that time the gas was really rumbly and when it was time to assume the position when the first pledge had put her nose to sniff my butt I blasted one right in her face. It was funny to hear a bunch of girls scream keep farting in their face as pledge after pledge ending up gagging from the smell of my farts. I bet their noses burned from smelling all the farts I farted last night. Even after I came home and went to bed I woke myself up by farting really loud in bed
For lunch yesterday we had hot dogs and my wife made her famous baked beans. Every time she makes them I load up on them. After we ate I had to saw some pieces of wood with a handsaw. As I was sawing my belly started rumbling with gas. I felt a fart brewing and I let it rip. It was loud and smelled. She walked outside to ask me something and she walked right into the fart cloud. She wrinkled her face at the smell. I continued farting all afternoon
We just ate dinner. Hot dogs and baked beans. After dinner I went to clean the bathrooms. Didn't take long for the gas to kick in. I felt a gas bubble in my ass and when I started to bend over and clean I let it rip. Then I just kept farting. My girlfriend said she not only heard them but also smelled them. I have chronic gas issues and fart all the time. My girlfriend says I'm the gassiest 22 year old man ever
My girl learned the hard way not to stand behind me when I have bad gas. I had baked beans for dinner and afterwards while I was cleaning the bathroom my girl was standing behind me while I was scrubbing the toilet and I had to fart really bad. I was bent over and I basically farted in her face and it really stunk.
Have been mostly cheese free for the past couple of months - had cream cheese last night and within half an hour was doing horrible ones. Fine again today then had more cream cheese for dinner and BOOM! Horrible farts.
My girlfriend just ate a burrito and is convinced the cheese is what is causing her to fart so much. Her butt is a vote for cheese as the worst fart. It is beyond description.
My farts are so loud that the whole room stinks up. I'm a boy, and my farts are always loud, strong, and very gassy. I love the sound of my farts. They are the loudest farts I ever heard of.
I got this friend by the name Greyson. Apparently he had cheese during the day, now he cannot quit farting under the blanket. I mean its lingering hardcore like a lost soul.
Had like 12 deviled eggs at my boyfriends family cook out and I had SO much flatulence. Bubbly low pitched duck farts slipped out here and there. I was most embarrassed when his uncle Flex was walking behind me and I didn't know so I let out a big one! About seven seconds long and he said "whooo. Baby girl them eggs done did somethin vicious to those guts! That fart was bout BUBBLY as HELL, smell like you just put some warm egg salad under my nose! Damn! " Then he walked away and I tried to secretly fan the smell away.
One time, after my 5 year old daughter was finished eating 3 eggs, she fell asleep with me. I thought that she was just fidgeting around, but I didn't know that her tummy was rumbling with gas. And the next thing I knew was that she passed gas REALLY loud and boy, did it stink! I was like "Whoooo!" And I started fanning like crazy. I didn't know that a 5 year old would have so much gas! But she did feel better though, so I rubbed her tummy for a few seconds and went back to sleep.
I was in history and I had a bad case of bubble guts, so I walked infront of this really annoying guy and waited until I felt my horrible flatulence bubble around and I said "here Larry, deviled eggs! " And I released the bubbliest horrifically gassy fart in his face and after the 8 second long fart I walked away and stood there and boy that fart stunk like I had given him a deviled egg platter, I said "whoowee" and slowly fanned the fart away
Had eggs before a big test, and I get so Damn gassy when I'm nervous! You could hear my stomach rumbling and I let out like thirty shouldn't farts, the room shelled absolutely terrible! As I got up to go to the bathroom I let an atrocious fart bubble out and the odor was so obnoxious nobody could focus and they looked at me in disgust
I had a cheesy mash with lots of almost-raw onions in it and then an hour later all of hell broke loose. The three cats are wide-eyed and ears pricked every time another mushroom cloud of onion stink is emitted; if they survive the fallout they're going straight to a pet shrink to be checked for PTSD. The funniest thing is how these malevolent ass-maelstroms defy logic by smelling more like onions than onions themselves. It's almost beautiful.
Before practice with my jazz band I had a cheesesteak with onions and onion rings for lunch. I'm the only guy in the band, which is very small but awesome. as I was driving to practice my stomach started making noises. right before practice I let out a muffled but still pretty loud belch. the saxophonist next to me was like you have gas? I thought it would help but as soon as we started playing the farts started blasting out of my ass. it was like loud music coming out of my bass sax and my booty. except the ones out of my booty really stunk and the smell wafted through the room! some of the girls faces showed they were grossed out by how bad they smelled
Onion Rings produce flatus 6 - 8 hours after consumption. The resultant flatulence frequency is mind blowing as well as room clearing. My mates have a seasonal Friday evening gathering after eating boxes of onion rings fron Burger King for lunch. The morning poo isn't a pleasant texture but smells perfectly like onion. Great for laughs but not good for your guts or the pizza delivery guy you fart on as you close the door.
It's about a 6 hour wait period after eating an onion dish before they begin. My farts could easily be mistaken for an onion scented propellant. Lots of gas - 4 to 5 hours of activity. People are regularly offended. Other foods don't seem to have anywhere near the same effect. I use leaks as a substitute in cooking when appropriate.
Curry farts are the best! A lamb vindaloo and I could replace the whole brass section of the London Symphony Orchestra. Smell is interesting though as it still has the meatyness of lamb with the underlying essence of spice... Would burn your eyes though.
About an hour after consuming curry the wind starts. It's painful (my belly groans, gurgles and bloats), it stinks and it last for about 24 hours!
Give me a good vindaloo and I have explosive farts for two days! Especially if it's washed down with a couple of lagers...
I kept waking myself up last night trumping like a trooper. And the smell something died inside me!
The Brussel sprout is part of the cruciferous vegetable family and naturally causes gas. Usually dairy has me farting like a Clydesdale but this is just as bad
All I have to do is just look at them and the flatulence starts.
Yes! Immediately! I was shocked and had to look it up.
Brussel sprouts made me leave the room, left the hamster behind, R.I.P. hammy
Roasted some eggplant, my husband is so gross he won't stop farting and excusing himself to the bathroom! But I'm mega tooting myself, will not be a romantic evening! Might as well watch Law and order cause there is nothing less romantic than that, plus after eggplant booty!
I fart a lot, but recently I made a moussaka and my eggplant farts it caused could not have been more disgusting than almost anything else I have ever had. In fact right up there with bean stew farts. What is it with such an innocent vegtable... Shame really
I found this site by looking up "farting after eating eggplant." I have been experiencing none-stop horrific gas since last night. I now know why... It was the eggplant dinner I ate.
Made eggplant for the first time and I have been farting every 10 seconds for over an hour! Even the dog wont stay in the room anymore!
Had broccoli at work, horrible mistake! It was my first day on the job and I was sooo nervous I get the WORST flatulence when I'm nervous! Farts smelled absolutely atrocious! God I was so embarrassed I knew everyone could hear AND smell the gassy farts coming from my cubical!, later I was on the elevator with another guy and I farted a BAD ONE. I got really nervous and said I was sorry as I quickly fanned my butt as a couple other loud ones bubbled out and he said it was fine it happens to everyone. Later I decided to take the stairs to relieve some gas only to fart a bubbly broccoli fart in a hot interns face
If you want to have bad gas just eat broccoli! I was waiting downstairs to help my grandfather and I knew he was coming when I heard a bunch of loud farts coming from him. he toots all the time when he doesn't eat broccoli anyway. there wasn't anything I could do whide he was sawing wood with a handsaw and as sawing he was farting at the same time. when he was finished he ripped another huge long one.
Gassy farts at a funeral. It was terrible, I farted as we walked around to observe the casket and everybody had to walk into my gassy cloud of farts, I tried to fan the farts away but an elderly woman caught me and said "so you're the one who's got the place smelling like eggsalad, what did you eat sunny boy? "
Due to the fact it is the only food on the list also on my Sunday dinners... I have been trying to find out whilst the whole house facts so much after wards and upon seeing this I am blaming the broccoli laugh out loud
Pizza is a yeasted flatbread generally topped with tomato sauce and cheese and baked in an oven. It is commonly topped with a selection of meats, vegetables and condiments. The term was first recorded in the 10th century, in a Latin manuscript from Gaeta in Central Italy. I ate 5 slices of pizza over the course of a few hours last night. Grossly enough the farts smelled a bit like garlic and cheese which had been laid thick on the slices. It's midafternoon right now and I'm still ripping out garlic/cheese scented farts. Pizza has my vote.
This pizza will make you the winner of the fart party!.. Woke up farting incessantly... Had to turn the fan on, spray deodorant, and leave the room! Winner...
My girlfriend, despite being very skinny farts like a truck driver. Whenever she has pizza, which is pretty much everyday she has the stinkiest farts
Don't need a gas station after eating pizza, just back up to the car and fart in the gas tank!
It doesn't make me fart but gives me the burps. Don't chug it before a game. Imagine playing fullback in a football game whIle blocking players while you had a case of the burps. It also gave me a really bad case of the hiccups the whole game. As I was blocking all everyone heard the entire game was my hiccups then a big burp as I was throwing my blocks
Not only does Pepsi make me fart a lot it makes me belch really loud. That's why I am known as the belching blocking back. All the running back has to do is follow the sound of the fart or belch coming from me to know where I'm going to block and he can get the most yards. And the best part is the stink of the fart lingers
I drink coke before I play a football game. Perfect for a caffeine buzz but when you're blocking another player and you get hit in the stomach you're going to belch really loud. I play fullback and the only job I have is to be a blocking back and believe me I belch several times a game
When me and my bff drink fizzy drinks I wet fart and she burps they smell terrible. So we taught the class bully a lesson I farted on his face and then she burp and blowed him for 5 minutes then she held his mouth open so I could fart into it and the best part it came out wet.it was quite mean but he's tormented every one and threatened my friends that if I don't kiss him he'd kick us
Had cabbage at work, farts smelled like broccoli mixed with eggs, was on the elevator with another guy and I farted a BAD ONE. I got really nervous and said I was sorry as I quickly fanned my butt as a couple other loud ones bubbled out and he said it was fine it happens to everyone. Later I decided to take the stairs to relieve some gas only to fart a bubbly broccoli fart in a hot interns face
Working the grave yard shift can get quiet and boring. There are 5 of us in the building and somehow have started a nastiest fart Olympics.
To sweep the gold medal I mixed cabbage and baked beans washed down with Bush beer. Did a WWF wrestling pose with each explosion. All 5 of us ended up outside breathing fresh air.
After eating sauerkraut tonight, I keep having to open the sliding glass door to fart out of it, or else I'd be swallowed up by the stink.
My roommate came in after I farted after eating cabbage and she said it smelled like dog fart... I think cabbage farts smell the worst.
A huge bowl of Harvest Crunch does it for me every time, even my neighbors hate me on those days!
Oh God, I don't eat much foods, but when I eat cereal, my stomach doesn't want to go unheard, and I rip 'em all morning!
I would have never thought that eating cereal would cause my farting problem. This us very interesting for me.
I ate 4 tablespoons of cereal flakes in my yoghurt and I've been farting 3 days long, with several breaks of course.
3 hours before I go to bed, I make sure I have at least 4 glasses of warm milk, this milk comb mixes perfectly in my tummy, I get the smelliest farts all night, my wife tends to send me to the couch because it smells like propane, I once farted on her sisters face when we were camping and she hasnt spoken a word to me since that. Loudest farts thus far, I love the feel of my ass getting ripped open in my work cubicle, I'm 100% sure everyone in my floor thinks that patrick the fat guy next to me rips those farts but noo they are mistaken, its all me, sweet dairy milky farts
I LOVE milk, but when I drink a lot I get really gassy and my stomach would hurt like hell. Once I drank so much milk and farted in my friends room and he almost THREW UP because of the smell. I literally feel like the new kid in Stick of Truth and Fractured But Whole whith his "fart powers" (these are south park games by the way)
If dairy products such as milk and cheese cause stinky farts, it maybe a sign of lactose intolerance.
Unless you have the lactose intolerance, most of the Asian have it, otherwise the fart wont happen.
I decided for the final band performance of the basketball season to make it a really stinky one. I went to the vegetarian Mexican restaurant and loaded up on food that would make me very gassy. So I ate a vegetarian platter and extra refried beans. I ate quickly before the game so the gas would kick in as soon as tip-off started. As soon as we took our seats I felt a large gas bubble and a couple of seconds later I felt myself deflate as I felt a huge fart being released. I fanned it so I could see if it stunk and it did so I waved it into the crowd. Someone was like who took a dump in their pants. Believe me the whole game I was playing and stinking up the place with my farting.
We went for Mexican food last night. My girl was starving because she was sick in bed with a stomach virus. Now when you have a stomach bug the day before Mexican might not be the best thing. But we ate there. After we ate a few hours later we called it a night. We were in bed an cuddling and she fell asleep before. After she fell asleep I heard her tummy rumble and then I heard her rip the most massive fart I ever heard come out of her big ass. The gas definitely kicked in because all night she was detonating monster farts and smelling up the room. I didn't tell her because I knew her tummy was still very sour.
At my college it's time to make sure that the sorority pledges can handle anything so the one that I do the dirty work for needed my butt last night. So I went to the local Mexican restaurant and loaded up on veggie burritos and refried beans. It was all you can eat. Then I went to waffle house which also makes me gassy and ate a patty melt. So I was farting big time. All the girls were ready for me to blast farts that never had smelled as raunchy as they did last night. They were gagging and saying how bad it smelled. When I was finished the smell lingered in the room for a while. I was proud of myself!
I was making music out of both ends last night at my college. After playing my bari sax during the football game I was asked by a sorority to eat lots of beans so I could fart in the faces of the pledges. So I got a few cans of refried beans and chowed down. I ate them right before I walked over so I would have gas and my farts would stink. One of the sisters agreed to sniff to check how bad it smelled so I blasted one and she was like yeah that's pretty gross. So the pledges walked up one by one and put their nose on my butt crack and smelled my farts. When this is over they'll get a video of them smelling my butt. I kept my band pants on because the butt of the pants smelled from all the farting I did all day.
Okay my little brother smell like barf after he had tomato/noodly farts(to complicated to explain. He made our entire house 10 degrees hotter than it normally is. Whenever he eats pasta it gets a lot smelliest. We fanned it over into the neighbors yard anytime this happens.I for one think that his butt punishment for me is smelly smells. He doesn't even wash. He has made me faint before. I am rating pasta the biggest gas caused ever.
Pasta makes me fart
Pasta and spaghetti cause a lot of farts for me cause they have wheat try eating rice
Ate hot & spicy fried wings 2 days ago and the farts that are burning through my cheeks smell exactly like the fresh box I took home those 2 days ago. It is also accompanied by a serious gastrointestinal rumble and burn. There is no stopping, a mere handful of minutes between lashings. I work in a private office space but this spills out into the hallway, luckily for the other occupants of the building I'm at the end of the hall.
I'm a musician and one night after dinner I decided to play my bari sax. I noticed that I had a tummy ache after eating fried chicken and beans. After a little while I was playing I felt myself let a big fart rip and that started a storm of farts that smelled. My girlfriend asked if I had to take a crap because I had gas that bad
I recently realized that my intermittent farting spells have been caused by chicken. I knew that eggs did this but now I know that the things that lay them also cause me to have gas.
When I eat chikn fried, baked, grilled, Oh my god. I fart so much that it makes me laugh which makes me fart even more. I love chicken, but it hates me. Oh well. I'll just sleep on the couch. My girlfriend doesn't need a Dutch oven!
I know not why, I only know the result, and for me it only takes a sprinkle. As I submit this opinion I fear these shall be my final words, garlic causes epic farts for me without question, although entertaining, also painful and most foul. Oh no... Save yourself!
I have farted for almost a day strait. Thank god it's the weekend. I fart a lot and eat anything I want. I ate a lot of olives stuffed with garlic the other night and have been farting more than any other time In my life. It's crazy!
I ate a clove worth of garlic from an olive bar today. I've been farting non stop for 10 hours. Its epic because I was really bloated but each time I let rip a 4 second fart, I get to see my stomach go down a little.
I've always suffered from potent bottom wind. After moving to Morocco this became less of an issue until I reintroduced garlic into my diet. Now I'm windier than ever and all the more happy for it.
Sausage gives me a serious dose of the old rumble guts. First I get a slow gurgling sensation which works its way south until it reaches my bum, it feels like its wet, heavy and toxic, and that's BEFORE it is birthed... When it seeps out, dear god it is awful, the heat generated is tremendous and the smell... Atrocious, worst of all is the humid feeling in my pants and the constant burning sensation around my ring - piece. I usually check my trousers in the mirror to look for damp spots and never wear khaki's or chinos just in case.
I think this is where they got the idea for napalm.
Good Lord the British certainly know how to put words together. I vote this is the funniest one
Ah damn! I just slipped down the stairs and the sausages I brought fell out #cabbagesquad2016
Don't make me fart.
I made baked chicken with mushroom sauce today for my husband and I for dinner and we have been farting up a storm. It doesn't stink at all it's just so much gas I think I'm gonna open a gas station.
Within half an hour of eating them, I am a fart machine!
Every single time! I should know by now.
I own a cleaning service and one night I had to clean bathrooms at a restaurant after they closed. Since I knew it was going to be a late night I had dinner later in the evening and I had made veggie chili. When I do a job I work by myself. By the time I got to the restaurant the gas was starting. As I was cleaning the first stall I ripped a huge fart it stunk really bad. I pretty much tooted the whole time I was cleaning. And the toots smelled pretty much like what I ate and the smell lingered
A sorority wanted to find a guy who had the loudest and worst smelling farts so I went over for the contest. I had vegetarian chili so I could definitely win. I won easily so they used my butt one night. I ate a ton of it and all the new pledges had to see how long they could sniff my ass while I farted constantly and stink up the room. believe me most of the girls were so grossed out by how bad they stunk
I had chili for lunch before I went outside to saw some wood. I was working for a few minutes before it kicked in. My girl came out to see how I was doing. The first thing that happened was I felt a good belch coming up so I let it rip and then another belch came up and then it was all farts after that. And they smelled real bad!
Not only am I a bari sax player I also am a drummer. The people in the pep band are happy about that because the way I was farting tonight because of the veggie chili I had for dinner. Someone was like now the crowd can smell your ass instead of us! Believe me that seat stunk after I was sitting on it
I ate cauliflower and I farted a lot I went out with friends and they were all unhappy. I love farting, it feels good.
Hands down, cauliflower can cause some of the worse gas. Funky!
Have you seen Benchwarmers? If you have you understand why Beef Stew will make you rip!
Why do my farts smell so bad? Oh yeah, two bowls of beef stew last night!
I also poop stew the next day - terrible!
I am banned from eating these in my house. Even my cat looks at me, pins her ears back, and runs for the back door. The smell wakes me and my husband from a dead sleep. No more. Ever.
The farts smell exactly like peppers.
Being a college student means you don't make the best dietary decisions. I was constipated and I thought having a couple of bean burritos would do the trick. I was wrong. It did give me gas and throughout the whole jazz band concert the bari sax wasn't the only thing making noise. While I was playing I could feel my tummy rumble and then feel the fart blast out and I could smell how bad it was. I continued playing and farting the entire time. My girlfriend was playing next to me. When I got home I was still farting like crazy and my girl was like seriously.
Since my job now at college is to make a sororities pledges smell my farts I load up on taco bell bean burritos. last night a couple of sorority sisters asked me what qualifies as a good fart so being a guy I showed them. I was gassy so I rocked back, ripped a loud one and waved it towards my nose to see if it stinks. it did so I waved it their direction and they were pretty grossed out when the smell came their way
My girlfriend and I went out to dinner last night and it was all you can eat bean burritos at the local Mexican restaurant. I was starving so I chowed down. you probably know what happened next. I had gas and was farting up a storm. my farts stink when I don't eat beans and they were stinking big time. we were getting ready to go to sleep and I was still blasting them and my girlfriend was grossed out by how bad they stunk hours later
My girl made these for dinner last night, and soon as I started cleaning they kicked in. This is what she heard as I was cleaning the bathroom. Toot toot toot. She was like you have gas already?! Yeah I did and they smell!