Top 10 Foods that Make You Fart
Ever felt a rumble in your tummy that you just couldn't explain? Like some tiny gremlins were having a gas-fueled party in your gut? Well, chances are you ate something that's notorious for a little, ahem, flatulence.We're not here to shame anyone - passing gas is super normal and healthy! But let's be real, some foods tend to trigger those toots more than others. What makes your list of usual suspects? Think beans, certain veggies, maybe those sugar-free candies that seemed like a good idea at the time...
For lunch yesterday, we had hot dogs, and my wife made her famous baked beans. Every time she makes them, I load up on them. After we ate, I had to saw some pieces of wood with a handsaw. As I was sawing, my belly started rumbling with gas. I felt a fart brewing and I let it rip. It was loud and smelled. She walked outside to ask me something, and she walked right into the fart cloud. She wrinkled her face at the smell. I continued farting all afternoon.
We just ate dinner: hot dogs and baked beans. After dinner, I went to clean the bathrooms. It didn't take long for the gas to kick in. I felt a gas bubble, and when I started to bend over and clean, I let it rip. Then, I just kept farting. My girlfriend said she not only heard them but also smelled them. I have chronic gas issues and fart all the time. My girlfriend says I'm the gassiest 22-year-old man ever.
I have been mostly cheese-free for the past couple of months. Had cream cheese last night, and within half an hour, I was doing horrible ones. Fine again today, then had more cream cheese for dinner and BOOM! Horrible farts.
My girlfriend just ate a burrito and is convinced the cheese is what is causing her to fart so much. Her vote is for cheese as the worst fart culprit. It is beyond description.
My farts are so loud that the whole room stinks. I'm a boy, and my farts are always loud, strong, and very gassy. I love the sound of my farts. They are the loudest farts I've ever heard of.
Had like twelve deviled eggs at my boyfriend's family cookout and I had SO much flatulence. Bubbly, low-pitched duck farts slipped out here and there. I was most embarrassed when his uncle Flex was walking behind me and I didn't know, so I let out a big one! About seven seconds long and he said, "Whoo! Baby girl, them eggs done did somethin' vicious to those guts! That fart was 'bout BUBBLY as HELL, smell like you just put some warm egg salad under my nose! Damn!" Then he walked away, and I tried to secretly fan the smell away.
I had a cheesy mash with lots of almost-raw onions in it, and then an hour later all of hell broke loose. The three cats are wide-eyed and ears pricked every time another mushroom cloud of onion stink is emitted. If they survive the fallout, they're going straight to a pet shrink to be checked for PTSD. The funniest thing is how these malevolent ass-maelstroms defy logic by smelling more like onions than onions themselves. It's almost beautiful.
Before practice with my jazz band, I had a cheesesteak with onions and onion rings for lunch. I'm the only guy in the band, which is very small but awesome. As I was driving to practice, my stomach started making noises. Right before practice, I let out a muffled but still pretty loud belch. The saxophonist next to me was like, You have gas?
I thought it would help, but as soon as we started playing, the farts started blasting out of me. It was like loud music coming out of my bass sax and my booty, except the ones out of my booty really stunk. The smell wafted through the room. Some of the girls' faces showed they were grossed out by how bad they smelled.
Curry farts are the best! A lamb vindaloo, and I could replace the whole brass section of the London Symphony Orchestra. The smell is interesting though, as it still has the meatiness of lamb with the underlying essence of spice. It would burn your eyes though.
About an hour after consuming curry, the wind starts. It's painful (my belly groans, gurgles, and bloats). It stinks, and it lasts for about 24 hours!
Give me a good vindaloo, and I have explosive farts for two days! Especially if it's washed down with a couple of lagers.
I ate pizza at my boyfriend's house because I was staying for the night. After the pizza, the flow started. My stomach hurt like heck, and I had the stinkiest farts in the world. The smell lasted for a day. My boyfriend felt like throwing up.
I eat pizza all the time and I get tooty toot syndrome. My pizza toots don't smell really disgusting, but they smell like cheese! My older brother says I'm weird for farting and that no one farts in the world, but he farts in his room to act like it. I need a doctor!
I ate five slices of pizza over the course of a few hours last night. Grossly enough, the farts smelled a bit like garlic and cheese, which had been laid thick on the slices. It's midafternoon right now, and I'm still ripping out garlic/cheese-scented farts. Pizza has my vote.
The Brussels sprout is part of the cruciferous vegetable family and naturally causes gas. Usually, dairy has me farting like a Clydesdale, but this is just as bad.
All I have to do is just look at them, and the flatulence starts.
Yes! Immediately! I was shocked and had to look it up.
I roasted some eggplant. My husband is so gross - he won't stop farting and excusing himself to the bathroom! But I'm mega tooting myself. It will not be a romantic evening! Might as well watch Law and Order because there is nothing less romantic than that, plus after-eggplant booty!
I fart a lot, but recently I made a moussaka, and the eggplant farts it caused could not have been more disgusting than almost anything else I have ever had. In fact, they were right up there with bean stew farts. What is it with such an innocent vegetable? Shame, really.
Had broccoli at work - horrible mistake! It was my first day on the job, and I was so nervous. I get the worst flatulence when I'm nervous! The farts smelled absolutely atrocious! God, I was so embarrassed. I knew everyone could hear and smell the gassy farts coming from my cubicle!
Later, I was on the elevator with another guy, and I farted a bad one. I got really nervous and said I was sorry as I quickly fanned my butt. A couple of other loud ones bubbled out, and he said it was fine - it happens to everyone. Later, I decided to take the stairs to relieve some gas, only to fart a bubbly broccoli fart in a hot intern's face.
It doesn't make me fart, but it gives me the burps. Don't chug it before a game. Imagine playing fullback in a football game while blocking players and having a case of the burps! It also gave me a really bad case of the hiccups for the whole game. As I was blocking, everyone heard my hiccups, then a big burp as I was throwing my blocks.
Not only does Pepsi make me fart a lot, but it also makes me belch really loud. That's why I am known as the belching blocking back. The running back just follows the sound of the fart or belch coming from me to know where I'm going to block, and he can get the most yards. The best part is the stink of the fart lingers!
I had cabbage at work. My farts smelled like broccoli mixed with eggs. I was on the elevator with another guy, and I farted a bad one. I got really nervous and said I was sorry as I quickly fanned my rear. A couple of other loud ones bubbled out, and he said it was fine, it happens to everyone.
Later, I decided to take the stairs to relieve some gas, only to fart a bubbly broccoli fart in a hot intern's face.
Working the graveyard shift can get quiet and boring. There are five of us in the building, and somehow we started a nastiest fart Olympics. To sweep the gold medal, I mixed cabbage and baked beans, washed down with Busch beer. I did a WWF wrestling pose with each explosion. All five of us ended up outside breathing fresh air.
A huge bowl of Harvest Crunch does it for me every time. Even my neighbors hate me on those days!
Oh God, I don't eat much food, but when I eat cereal, my stomach doesn't want to go unheard, and I rip 'em all morning!
I would have never thought that eating cereal would cause my farting problem. This is very interesting for me.
I decided for the final band performance of the basketball season to make it a really stinky one. I went to the vegetarian Mexican restaurant and loaded up on food that would make me very gassy. So, I ate a vegetarian platter and extra refried beans. I ate quickly before the game so the gas would kick in as soon as the tip-off started.
As soon as we took our seats, I felt a large gas bubble. A couple of seconds later, I felt myself deflate as I released a huge fart. I fanned it to see if it stunk, and it did, so I waved it into the crowd. Someone was like, Who took a dump in their pants? Believe me, the whole game I was playing and stinking up the place with my farting.
I love to drink milk. I was at my mom's house, and as always, I drank 9 glasses per day. I farted the stinkiest farts ever! My brother made me go to the couch.
Three hours before I go to bed, I make sure I have at least four glasses of warm milk. This milk combination mixes perfectly in my tummy. I get the smelliest farts all night. My wife tends to send me to the couch because it smells like propane. I once farted on her sister's face when we were camping, and she hasn't spoken a word to me since.
Loudest farts thus far! I love the feel of my ass getting ripped open in my work cubicle. I'm 100% sure everyone on my floor thinks that Patrick, the fat guy next to me, rips those farts, but no, they are mistaken. It's all me - sweet, dairy, milky farts.
Every time I eat chicken nuggets, I fart up a storm.
Okay, my little brother smells like barf after he has tomato/noodly farts (too complicated to explain). He made our entire house ten degrees hotter than it normally is. Whenever he eats pasta, it gets a lot smellier. We fanned it over into the neighbor's yard anytime this happens. I, for one, think that his butt punishment for me is smelly smells. He doesn't even wash. He has made me faint before. I am rating pasta the biggest gas-causer ever.
Pasta and spaghetti cause a lot of farts for me because they have wheat. Try eating rice.
Ate hot and spicy fried wings two days ago, and the farts that are burning through my cheeks smell exactly like the fresh box I took home those two days ago. It is also accompanied by serious gastrointestinal rumble and burn. There is no stopping, a mere handful of minutes between lashings. I work in a private office space, but this spills out into the hallway. Luckily for the other occupants of the building, I'm at the end of the hall.
I'm a musician, and one night after dinner, I decided to play my bari sax. I noticed that I had a tummy ache after eating fried chicken and beans. After a little while of playing, I let a big fart rip, and that started a storm of smelly farts. My girlfriend asked if I had to take a crap because my gas was that bad.
Nothing says "I love you" like warming up the bed and blankets on a cold winter's night for the wife. Just grab a late-night bowl of full-dairy ice cream, and you will have all the fuel you need to heat up that Dutch oven!
Jeez, every time I eat this, something smells horrible through my butthole.
I don't know why, but for me, it only takes a sprinkle. As I submit this opinion, I fear these shall be my final words. Garlic causes epic farts for me without question. Although entertaining, they are also painful and most foul. Oh no... Save yourself!
I have farted for almost a day straight. Thank God it's the weekend. I fart a lot and eat anything I want. I ate a lot of olives stuffed with garlic the other night and have been farting more than any other time in my life. It's crazy!
I ate a clove's worth of garlic from an olive bar today. I've been farting non-stop for 10 hours. It's epic because I was really bloated, but each time I let rip a 4-second fart, I get to see my stomach go down a little.
Sausage gives me a serious dose of the old rumble guts. First, I get a slow gurgling sensation which works its way south until it reaches my bum. It feels wet, heavy, and toxic - and that's before it is birthed. When it seeps out, dear God, it is awful. The heat generated is tremendous, and the smell... atrocious. Worst of all is the humid feeling in my pants and the constant burning sensation around my ring-piece.
I usually check my trousers in the mirror to look for damp spots and never wear khakis or chinos just in case. I think this is where they got the idea for napalm.
Today, my family and I went to TGI Friday's, and I ate some fries. Man, when I got home, I ran straight to my room and locked the door. After I finished farting, I couldn't breathe.
All fast food fries are a no for me. Even just two or three sticks, and everybody's nostrils are done for! It never used to be a problem, but suddenly it's run for your lives. I blame it on potatoes... but why me?
Cause of smelly farts. Personal experience.
I own a cleaning service, and one night I had to clean bathrooms at a restaurant after they closed. Since I knew it was going to be a late night, I had dinner later in the evening, and I had made veggie chili. When I do a job, I work by myself. By the time I got to the restaurant, the gas was starting. As I was cleaning the first stall, I ripped a huge fart. It stunk really bad. I pretty much tooted the whole time I was cleaning, and the toots smelled pretty much like what I ate. The smell lingered.
A sorority wanted to find a guy who had the loudest and worst-smelling farts, so I went over for the contest. I had vegetarian chili so I could definitely win. I won easily, so they used my butt one night. I ate a ton of it, and all the new pledges had to see how long they could sniff my rear while I farted constantly and stunk up the room. Most of the girls were grossed out by how bad it smelled.
I made baked chicken with mushroom sauce today for my husband and me for dinner. We have been farting up a storm. It doesn't stink at all. It's just so much gas that I think I'm going to open a gas station.
Within half an hour of eating them, I am a fart machine!
Every single time! I should know by now.
I ate cauliflower, and I farted a lot. I went out with friends, and they were all unhappy. I love farting. It feels good.
Hands down, cauliflower can cause some of the worst gas. Funky!