Best Ron Swanson Quotes

The Top Ten

1 "When I eat, it is the food that is scared"

2 "I have a lot of money that I keep in a certain location. I've said too much already"

3 "That was decoy gold. You think I would keep my gold in a safe underground where anyone could find it"

4 "Andy's the only one I don't actively root against. There I go, getting all sappy"

5 Leslie - "I know that you secretly like artichokes and plums" Ron - "Keep your voice down woman!!"

6 "I was working two woodworking jobs at once, all while trying to finish middle school"

7 "I've cried twice in my life. Once was when I was seven and I got hit by a bus, and the other was when I found out Lil' Sebastian died"

8 "There's been a mistake. You gave me food that my food eats."

9 Never half-ass two things. Full-ass one thing.

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