Worst Metal Music Videos
Considering the metalhead population on this site, I am surprised this list hasn't been created before. There is a list of worst music videos in general, but it mostly consists of (and will consist of) recent pop and rap hits. The metal subgenres with the worst music videos are generally glam or glam-reminiscent heavy metal or black metal. There are two groups: the hilariously, amusingly bad videos that were often made out to be a parody (some parody videos aren't funny at all though), but if they weren't, they're even funnier considering they were taken seriously, and the other group is videos that are just wrong on every level, they can be obscene, overly violent even for metal, or just poorly executed. Note how showing a certain emotion or state in a very obvious way (e.g. expressing anger with fist hits) has a particularly disgust-inducing effect
Currently, my least (maybe 2nd or 3rd least) favorite song of all time. Both the music and the video seem like a parody. However, they sadly weren't, and they even released this abomination as a single. Even worse, its like/dislike ratio on YouTube is 97%, and one of the comments says "greatest song of all time."
All of their movements look like a mockery of typical gestures of rock musicians (headbanging, tough guy movements, thrilled drumming).
The video starts with footage from a landfill, then it is either poor live captions or the singer acting like a wannabe tough guy, involving kicking over a garbage can, throwing a television into the river or sea, and walking on railroads.
The song isn't any better. This album (and band) is infamous for getting 9 reviews with 0% in a row on Encyclopedia Metallum. They are supposed to be a parody of thrash clichés (just look at their song titles and band member nicknames), although they don't make me laugh.
The song includes a "legendary" lyric line: "Just when I thought they knew the answers, I changed the questions!"
Description for YouTube upload: Eastern European tree-hugging black metal. Their website has a tree on the top. They label their own style as "forest black metal."
This is already #7 on the list of Top 10 Worst Music Videos, so I guess a lot of people would choose this as their #1 pick.
Obvious choice for #1. The only reason I haven't put it there is that hating on such obvious trolling is a bit irrelevant.
After all these pieces that needed some research to find just for the sake of getting disgusted or negatively amused by them, let's admit that metal bands everyone knows also flop sometimes when it comes to videos. I was in a close battle over whether I should put Turbo Lover or Hot Rockin' on the list.
I wonder if current trendy songs' videos will look this funny 30 years later as well because almost all 1980s pop song videos are comedy gold.
Judas Priest isn't the only mainstream metal band that made such a bad music video. Megadeth has Super Collider, and Iron Maiden has Can I Play with Madness, among others, but they don't come close to Turbo Lover.
There is a person dressed up as some kind of witch who looks like a puppet going round and round a haunted forest (what else do you expect from a black metal video?) with sticks and axes in his hand. Of course, it is in the worst resolution possible, with a shaking camera and unrealistic colors and lights.
I don't like including multiple songs of the same artist on general lists, but here I make an exception. Encyclopedia Metallum quote: "It made me wish Jim Henson would rise from his grave to seek vengeance upon them for simultaneously butchering both thrash metal and puppetry."
Puppets kill and torture each other in various ways while the song's lyrics are basically song titles of classic thrash bands glued together.
I know, hair metal isn't metal, but since the worst metal bands list is bloated with nu-metal and metalcore bands the voters otherwise don't consider metal, let's let the "poser" genres on this list as well. The fact that this is hair metal already describes the video pretty well. Expect outdated 1980s smoke effects, open jackets, and men with rainbow hair.
The video shows a group of naked, bald women torturing another woman (or just a teenage girl?) lying on a bed with a knife, all set in a ruined dark cellar. They first seem to mutilate her, then they cut her throat, and the video shows blood spilling out of the victim's mouth. I don't know when torturing defenseless young women became a true and badass act, but this video isn't even for a brutal death metal song. It's for one of the poppiest thrash metal songs I've heard.
The worst thing about it is that it requires no age certification on YouTube.
Edit: Now I realize the video is depicting some pagan blood sacrifice ritual.
This is kind of a filler item. This video is nowhere near as bad as the others. However, singer Ross Jennings's movements are a bit laughable and resemble a kids' puppet player more than a prog vocalist. The song itself is one of the happiest I know, so I guess they tried to make the video as uplifting and joyful as possible to fit it. Overall, the album Affinity was designed to be a bit cheesy in an entertaining way, hence the synthwave and dubstep influences and the video game score resembling sections.
I don't consider this song metal, though, but the band is labeled so anyway. I've added it here.
