Top Ten Reasons Why Black Metal is Better Then Hair Metal

Lucretia

The Top Ten

1 Black metal bands care about their music.

Not Venom. Also, hair metal bands can’t just because they’re hair metal? - CostcoHotDogs

2 Hair metal is over commercialized.

That doesn’t make black metal better and that doesn’t mean hair metal is bad. - CostcoHotDogs

3 Glam metal all sounds the same.

And black metal doesn’t? Whenever I listen to Venom, it sounds like a constipated moose that thinks it has talent. - CostcoHotDogs

4 Black metal is more complex.

Complexity < Quality. - CostcoHotDogs

Great list. And I agree most of these but not with this one.
Actually, black metal isn't really that complex. It just needs a lot of energy on tremolo picking. The riffs are mostly made from endless tremolo picking consisting on different notes. Many non-black metal great guitarists like Ritchie Blackmore, Eddie Van Halen, MAB, Eric Johnson, Matt Bellamy or Dick Dale has tremendous skill on tremolo picking. But they don't use it often. Cause it just makes the sound heavy/fast. So, I think any good guitarist has the skill for playing black metal. But not all black metal guitarist have skills for playing other genres.

For example, You could listen to Buckethead's Soothsayer. There is a very fast tremolo picking. Approximately at 8:00. Which is faster than most black metal riffs. - zxm

5 Black metal lyrics are not sexual or sappy.

Sappy lyrics > Songs about murdering people or satan - CostcoHotDogs

Usually death metal, yeah, but black metal does it as well, and black metal has more about satan than killing people. - CostcoHotDogs

6 Black metal has a more complex history.

Having a complex history doesn’t make it better. - CostcoHotDogs

7 Hair metal lyrics are more profane.

That’s not a reason. - CostcoHotDogs

8 Black metal has better lyrical themes.

I’d rather hear sappy love songs than songs about killing people or satan. - CostcoHotDogs

9 Black metal has a better variety of instruments.

Not really. - CostcoHotDogs

10 Hair metal bands have awful hair and makeup.

Glam metal artists = Bunch of Gays. They don't need to sing about girls. They are girls themselves. Weird stage performances. - zxm

I’d rather watch some transvestites than some dumbass who wears “corpsepaint”. - CostcoHotDogs

The Contenders

11 Hair Metal doesn't even sound like real metal

It’s not metal, it’s rock. It’s been mislabeled. That doesn’t mean black metal is better either. - CostcoHotDogs

12 Hair Metal has better riffs

No. Please stop submitting stuff like this to my list - Lucretia

13 Black Metal musicians look like interesting elves

Okay I guess... - Lucretia

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