Top Ten Things to Do If You See a Scary Clown

Around September 2016, reports of clowns lurking around the streets and houses scaring people had begun. Some states in the US, (such as North and South Carolina), have clowns attempting to lure kids into a bush, to do god knows what. Luckily, I haven't faced a clown yet, but what do you do when you see a clown? Take a look at this list for your safety.
The Top Ten
1 Run Away

And jump into a haystack, when they walk by it looking for you kill them and drag their corpse into the hay.

This would be my first instinct. There's no way I'm going near a clown. Those things aren't for 5-year-olds!

Oh yeah, this is amazing really, why is this happening?

Run?! I would beat the heck out of them instead!

2 Grab Your Weapon

My dad has a riffle in his closet. And In my neighborhood the clowns have already killed 6 people. So whenever a creepy clown knocks at my door, or I see him. I can grab my dad's riffle and shoot him until the bullets run out.

Yep, weapons are great for protection, self- defense, and hunting. so, I'm not going to free candy van.

I'll run and gun him into the ocean.

Yeah! As a weapon for protection.

3 Fight It

And then enjoy heaven.

Kick it until it dies.

4 Call 911

I live in the Carolina's and every 5 seconds there is a kid being lured into a bush. I have called 911 and I got a clown arrested. Thanks for the list Catacorn, its very helpful.

They'll get arrested for "Clowning Around".

5 Kick It in the Nuts

Yeah! Awesome! Dude, I would do this if a clown ever comes near me!

And crack them, that's what clowns deserve.

What if it's a girl?

6 Stay Indoors

The safest option on the list.

Keep traps around too.

7 Lock All Windows, Doors, and Vents
8 Say "I Like Trains" Right Next to Him
9 Act Friendly Towards It

Maybe you should hug it, after all, he has a sign saying free hugs.

And then command it to destroy other clowns.

Are you making a reference to It?

10 Sic Your Dog on Them

Rumor has it that the colorful parts of the clown taste like birthday cake, so any German shepherd, pit bull, or just a very vicious chihuahua would enjoy chomping down on his arms, legs, etc.

Unless it's a circus dog.

The Contenders
11 Knock Him Out
12 Slice Him Up

Do your best Toshiro Mifune imitation, and eviscerate the clown.

Like a ninja on steroids.

13 Roundhouse Kick Him
14 Flirt with Him
15 Tickle Him
16 Get in His Van for the Free Candy

Oh gosh. Once in my neighborhood there were reports of a white van driving around, offering kids candy. I wasn't allowed to go into the woods on my street after that. 😬 I still don't know what he would do if he got close enough, and he hasn't been caught...

That's what you do, right?

17 Pepper Spray Her
18 Tickle His Belly Button

The best course of action of course.

19 Set Up a Trap

Bear trap should do the trick.

I was hoping to see this.

20 Take a Video
21 Give Him Cryptolocker
22 Put Him in a Headlock
23 Act Casual
24 Challenge Him to a One-On-One Wrestling Match
25 Flip Him Off
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