Top 10 Things Americans Have that Canadians Want

Don't get me wrong, I am a proud Canadian. Always have been. But there are a few things that America has that we're a little jealous of, if we're being honest here.

Of course, we have free health care. Let's not forget about that now.

1. Cheaper cell phone rates

   Our rates are ridiculous when compared to what Americans pay. The services offered are far inferior, also.

2. A wider selection of grocery products

   Walk into any section of any American grocery store and, if you're familiar with the selection in Canadian supermarkets, you'll be shocked at how much more there is to choose from.

   Grocery shopping is monopolized in Canada, thanks to our government protecting their friends.

3. Overall cheaper prices

   Everything is cheaper. Everything. It makes me want to cry sometimes.

4. A more understandable system of government

   Most Canadians don't really know what's going on with the government. It's mainly because we have no idea how it works.

5. Our own tropical islands

   You guys have Hawaii. We have Prince Edward Island. Hardly everyone's choice for a destination.

   I think there is actually a tropical region in British Columbia due to a volcano.

6. Better looking women

   We're all fatties nowadays. Well, most of us are. We have to make do and keep having kids. And oh yeah, woke is dead, it just hasn't died yet.

7. More sports teams

   This is mainly concerning the NHL. Quebec City deserves their team back, Toronto could use a second team, and Hamilton is always a possibility for expansion. Look at how well it worked when Winnipeg got their team back. It could happen again, people!

   Hamilton would be a great candidate for an NHL team, but Toronto would want one too.

8. A stronger sense of national culture

   Yet America doesn't have a culture. We are a melting pot of different backgrounds, so there's nothing I would really consider "American" besides our flag-waving and maybe our original fast-food chains.

   This one might get me in a bit of trouble. But it's pretty much true. We hijack so much culture from the U.S. and we mistake it for our own. This is not the case all the time, but it is a frequent occurrence.

9. The same planet-wide respect

   The world, in general, respects America for its military, government, and overall way of life. Canada, on the other hand, is seen as a group of overly-apologetic French lumberjacks. Not exactly the look we were going for.

   Both countries are very diverse and have done a lot to help people and other countries, but it all boils down to some key lifestyle differences. For a start, Canada has free healthcare and less racial bias.

   Canada really fades into the woodwork next to America. You guys are just too cool and tend to keep to yourselves. Unlike us. However, if you did get the same recognition, it's the good along with lots of bad.

10. Alaska

    Just give it to us, please?

The Newcomers
11. ?

    Less taxes

12. ?

    Soul food

The Contenders

13. Better entertainment

    Canadian-produced television is so inferior. And our government enforces that a certain percentage of what is broadcasted on television is Canadian-based entertainment. It stinks.

14. Faster internet

15. High-speed rail