(A serial killer attacks you with a knife) Whoa! That's a cool knife!
This made me laugh. If someone is going to say that, good for them if they are a thrill seeker. That is going to be a shock! I wonder if the knife had its blade engraved.
Can you get it closer to my eyes so I can admire the shine? (Goes blind)
You can ask your last wish, "Gimme the knife!"
(You fall from the top of a 25-Storey building) Yay! I'm a Superman!
(You eat a deadly poison accidently) I didn't know this poison was sweet in taste.
I don't want to know what they taste like.
(You see a really big tornado just in front of you) Can you make me fly?
You'll probably be killed by a flying car or a two-by-four before getting too close to that thing.
(A man points a gun at you and is about to shoot you) Will you let me borrow your gun after you're done shooting?
Laugh out loud! Funny humor, this! I liked the serial killer knife as well... God bless.
I don't know why you need the gun... But I guess you have your reasons, right?
Murderer: You're gonna die. Spit out your last wish. I'll surely do it for you.
Victim: I need the gun.
(You're in an airplane which is going to crash) So how much time will it take for the airplane to come down?
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Please make your way to your seat and fasten your seat belts. We'll be coming down in about ten minutes."
BOOM
"Uh... Make that five minutes."
We are getting very close to the forest...
(You meet a bear at a forest without a gun) Hey! Can you tell me how many teeth you have? Just for General Knowledge sake.
I voted for this just so I could say that lions don't live in forests. They live in Africa. No forests there. You can find a bear in a forest, though.
(You're stuck inside a burning room) Awesome! Burn notice is on Netflix.
At least something interesting is happening around me!
(You get death sentence at law court) Will I be allowed to pee at the day of my execution?
Not if it's by electric chair. You know, for safety reasons.
"You will automatically wet yourself at the sight of Old Sparky..."
(Person stabs a knife into your stomach) Thank god! My doctor was telling me I needed more iron!
And it was on the day you needed your monthly iron infusion.
The Newcomers
? (About to jump into an endless pit) I wonder where this pit goes
? (Disintegrating) I don't feel so good
The Contenders
(At the hospital, dying) Lemme take my last selfie.
The person that added this shall tell us that they had added this!
Or say, "I left a million dollars under the-" Then die.
Let me say maybe not. By the way, thanks!
(Gets hit by falling skyscraper) Cool! It shows my house!
(A rattlesnake bites you) Ouch! Never mind!
Why waste my time worrying about a snakebite?
(Jumping from the top of a collapsing building) Hold on guys... I'll get help.
(Drowning) I think I can see Bikini Bottom
You can't talk when you're drowning. If you tried, no one would hear you, not even yourself.
I hope all of Bikini Bottom is crying for you...
(Serial killer attacks you) Hey will you visit my funeral?
(A shooting star is coming at your face) Pretty
(About to be crushed to death) I always wanted to be paper
(A bull charging at you) My, what big horns you have!
Superb! Who added this? Brilliant!
(Attacked by a serial killer) Wanna be friends?
(Organ failure) Organs, I want to tell you something, you failed me.
(Strapped to the electric chair) I'm about to bust a nut!
(About to be hanged) My neck hurts, will this make it feel better?
(Caught hypothermia) Elsa did it!
(Bleeding to death from the neck) Guys I'm a redneck!