Top Ten Reasons Elf on the Shelf is Creepy
Elf on the Shelf elves are sold with a book that explains how to interact with them. You can name your elf and even register it online, which supposedly brings it to life. According to the book, the elf flies to the North Pole each night to report to Santa on whether you've been good or bad. At least, that's what the book claims.
After owning one for about four years, I've found it increasingly creepy (sorry, Caroline!). Here are some reasons why an Elf on the Shelf might be unsettling.
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They say they watch you everywhere
If you put one in the bathroom, they will WATCH YOU POO.
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They move
Or at least they claim to move. You never know.
They do their magic, and you can't touch them.
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They have creepy faces
Honestly, their faces look like girls at my school who cake on too much makeup. Long eyelashes, blush, etc. It makes me frightened when I look at it.
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They hide in creepy places
Don't get me started when they hide in the bathroom, above the toilet...
They hide in the bathroom and watch kids poop.
The soap dish in the shower...
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They don't blink
They just seem to stare, and stare, and stare, and stare...
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They leave strange notes
My elf has left notes like, "You've been such a good kid this year, keep up the good work!" When I was little, I thought it was the coolest thing ever, but now it just makes me uncomfortable.
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They claim to go to Santa every night
Again, how can they travel so fast from where I am (MA) to the North Pole and arrive back to my house in time?
Maybe they have magic.
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They sit there like creepy decorations
They stare into your soul and don't seem to stop staring.
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They're like your personal stalkers
Their job is basically to watch you and never stop until Christmas...
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They claim to go to the North Pole to be 'cured' if you touch them
Once, my grandma touched Caroline (my elf), and she didn't even get "sent" to the North Pole. She was still there the next morning.
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They are everywhere