Most Random Things to Say In a Crowd

The Top Ten

1 I will beat you with a small child.

Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list. - fireinside96

This is the best random remark since 'go sit in a corner with a dried guava roll'! Lmfao... I am literally seeing myself. Laugh out loud. We need more of this stuff in the world. Ps. The people who added the 'random things to say in a crowd' points after #4 Re: T-rex's are really dull and boring, being creative is free and apparently so is seeking attention laugh out loud.

Extra funny if you say it after you do the dramatic duck face! I can just imagine people going, "What the..."

So funny.

V 45 Comments
2 Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

I said this to my mom and she said I have issues :) Thanks for this!

*I am a Potato!

Laugh out loud I like this one. but I am not a potato I am... A MARSHMALLOW! Cruz I squishy and soft and as pail as a ghost. So me is a marshmallow. laugh out loud

Told it to my parents. They didn't get it - AnonymousChick

How are you holding up? BECAUSE I'm A POTATO.

V 45 Comments
3 Sometimes when I'm alone I like to dress up in all brown, lay on the floor and pretend I'm a potato.

Sometimes when I'm alone, I dress all up in yellow, peel myself with a peeler and call myself a banana... Forever alone:(

I told all my friends this and they called me crazy... In a good way

That is the most hilarious thing since I saw my puppy dog licking my sisters barbie dolls butt

The 3 is brown lol

V 41 Comments
4 Don't freak out but my neighbor lives next to me.

Funny and corny @ the same time

HaHa! My teacher TOTALLY freaked out when I asked her to tell some news to my class, and I SAID IT! EVERYONE burst out laughing! My teacher laughed too! She said I was CRAZY!

Ha, so stupid its funny. Cx

I love that I said it to my nibor they were like hahaa

V 25 Comments
5 One time I died but I got better.

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! It is funny.

I tried that about 21 people laughed it's on youtube it's called?

I'm dead right now what prescription did you use. I mean I tried everything, water uh worms and more stuff yeah



V 23 Comments
6 Eat my pants!

Eat my shorts is off of the breakfast club..

I remember a guy saying this!

I'm pretty sure someone from either SpongeBob or Icarly or victorious has said it, I'd laugh so much if a person shouted it out!

From Simpsons when Bart says "eat my shorts! "

V 13 Comments
7 Isn't it weird that, pineapples never wear bikinis.

And isn't it weird that oranges never wear tank tops? That my mailbox doesn't like tomatoes? My refrigerator is wearing boxer shorts?!

This will be my gmail status!

I think it is weird that pineapples never wear bikinis and my mailbox doesn't like tomatoes


V 15 Comments
8 Shhh, the jalapenos are sleeping.

Make sure to say the J don't make it silent

I said this to my brother last year, lets just say he is still laughing.

What's next? The tomatoes are napping? The bananas are snoozing? The pumpkins are catching some sleep? Lol

Shhh, the pears are sleeping in pairs. - ihearyou

V 20 Comments
9 Once I saw a purple flying cow and I named it Phillip.

I wish the dancing unicorn could have seen him but he was too busy laughing at steve the snake.

, I had a hair named Jean, but he died.

This is funny, one of the best ones on here! Should be in the top tens!

Crap I meant to press number 7

V 21 Comments
10 I eat babies.

Holy CRAP! Hope I can rewind time! - moose4life19

That's just weird what

I ate a baby once...

Yo mama is so fat when god said let there be light he asked her to move out of the way!

V 10 Comments

The Newcomers

? Help me! I'm being chased by chicken headed carrots!

The Contenders

11 This is like retards humping a door nob

I'm a retard, I find this offensive

I didn't know other people did that too like can I have a orgy for this

Socially inappropriate comments are always good for a laugh. - Felon

This is like Donald Trump humping a drunk duck who ate his mother's ashes

V 17 Comments
12 Excuse me everyone, I have AIDS virus.

This is funny go away you haters, have a sense of humor... That's all

It's all fun in games until you wake up having AIDS -.-

I would of laughed at this a day ago until I found out I have aids -. -

I did it it got GREAT REACTIONS thanks for the silly sentence.

V 13 Comments
13 "Have you seen my dog? He is 6 foot tall and hates heights, he is brown and thinks he's got swag"

This is the only one out of this list that actually me laugh out loud.

I said this to my mom but instead I said have you seen rocket? (my dog) he is about,... 1 foot tall and hates bananas, he is black and I think he's got swag

My best friend laughs every time I tell her this. - funnyuser

He's a werewolf!

V 5 Comments
14 A giant baby head squished Obama V 4 Comments
15 Salty sticks of brilliance.

Fuzzyshadow of Leopardclan

This is something me and my friends would say while eating pretzels with salt or something

V 4 Comments
16 Allahu Akbar

Half life 3 confirmed.

It's annoying how people get worked up over this stuff, but that might just be me not having a religion.

Muslims are real people I'm muslim n real we don't mock your religion don't mock ours

That means "God is the greatest" And this is a post about weird lines to say to people. I guess "God is the greatest" IS in fact a "weird" line for nonreligious useless people like you.
Good one.

V 13 Comments
17 I like farting

This matches my brother's personality

That's so hilarious dude! My friends say it all of the time! LOLOLOLOLOL

V 4 Comments
18 Sometimes, I dream about cheese...

I like to lay in my bathtub with loads of cheese and tomato's on my naked body and roll up in a nice tortilla wrap and pretend I'm a chicken wrap.

Cheese actually can make you dream. Just saying'.

I dream about it too

Last night I dreamt about a fish.

V 8 Comments
19 *tap on somebody's sholder* can I sniff your butt?

No, you're a person, not a dog. Sniffing butts is something dogs do, not humans. - anonygirl

20 Pole Dancing Ducks

Okay, first, search Beastie Boys To All The Girls. Then sing this song in the crowd. But this. Is also funny and random. I SAW THIS ONCE.

V 1 Comment
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List StatsUpdated 23 Feb 2017

4,000 votes
634 listings
7 years, 34 days old

Top Remixes (23)

1. You know what day it is? Monday!
2. I like juggling teddy bears while breakdancing to the sound of a dishwasher!
3. I once made a pop-up book about charades!
1. Allahu Akbar
2. Cock
3. Excuse me everyone, I have AIDS virus.
1. A giant baby head squished Obama
2. You are like the roses in my vase. You should know that my roses are fake, smell bad, and have thorns which tries to harm you in every way possible. And guess what I hate my roses. Did I tell you that you are like the roses in my vase?
3. Shhh, the pencils are resting

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