Top Ten Quirky Quotations About War

The Top Ten

1 War is God's way of teaching Americans geography. (Anonymous)

2 The Gulf War was like teenage sex. We got in too soon and out too soon. (Tom Harkin)

But you were just waiting to re-enter her, weren't you?

3 The war in Iraq is simply Vietnam without the mosquitoes. (Carl Hiassen)

4 Retreat, hell! We're only attacking in another direction! (Oliver P. Smith)

5 My first battle was like German opera, too long and too loud. (Evelyn Waugh)

6 All castles had one major weakness. The enemy used to get in through the gift shop. (Peter Kay)

7 We need a futile gesture at this stage. It will raise the whole tone of the war. (Peter Cook)

8 Men love war because it allows them to look serious. Because they imagine it is the one thing that stops women laughing at them. (John Fowles)

For peace, let all women laugh on male war soldiers.

9 War is never a picnic. Although obviously soldiers do end up eating outdoors a lot. (Jesse Armstrong)

10 I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. (Joseph Heller)

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