The Top Ten Family Guy QuotesThe best one liners from the most irreverant show on network television. Only because it is animated do the writers get away with all the stuff they do.
The Top Ten
This is pretty darn hilarious - Celestius
Fabulous! So funny that it makes me laugh every single time! Watch it over and over again and I still burst out laughing!
Tears of laughter everywhere - peter is such an idiot and comedian at the same time
This is funnyV 13 Comments
haha i just watched that episode, came here, and saw this.. it was so funny.
Haha that's truly funny
One of my other favourite quotes from Peter Griffin lol
ClassicV 5 Comments
This should be #1 My whole family think's this is funny. - westofohio
Oh, my mom loves this. I joke around with her. Until it actually starts to get annoying.
Stewie is a speck of Eminem and a whole load of crazy put together
Back when family was still good. - IlikegamesV 19 Comments
giggity giggity, all right - Razor79
If Quagmire didn't exist, the show, and the world as we know it, would implode into a black hole. In my humble opinion
how could this not make number 1 or at least 2 man! - manglercmj
Quagmire is just hillarious family guy would be nothing without him. Well, it would still have Brian who is a largely unfunny dick but you know.V 14 Comments
A 'hard' one not to vote for! Giggigity, giggity, giggity!!! - MCW1966
Hilarious amazing best ever watch it forever now NOW ASDRASHDSEDRSGNDFA anyway this is like the best easily so vote for it everyone
On the floor funny, what sells the joke to me is that he says this time which implies this is a common thing
"This time" killed meV 9 Comments
This one cracks me up every time!
This one will never get old. Genius. All of the catchphrases are so boring now, but this one is so god damn hilarious! Love it!
I use this one all the time when I want to shut someone up! - theOpinionatedOne
LOLOL I'm gonna use that line whenever I'm asked a question like thatV 1 Comment
That episode was on yesterday
Man this one is the best from Stewie
Love it laugh out loud
That's so goodV 3 Comments
This is where it all falls out.. I mean come on.. Let the man of the house talk.. Laugh out loud
This is something that Fry would say in Futurama and I still love it.
It's just so funny, I mean come on guys and gals
Yup. Definitely a classic. "Leafers! "
Family guy should certainly stick to the their classic jokes. Not the ridiculousness they've now resorted to.
lol - 12ccV 1 Comment
Actually made me poke my head out of the kitchen and ask, "What did he just say? "
Most epic quote, I physically shot Pepsi out of my nose when I saw it.
Stewie is a pervert inside a lil boy body
Best quote of the whole series by far.V 2 Comments
Stewie is the best
Thi is so funny I making a little gift myself
Peter would probley think it was a toaster
Lois: Meg will you change Stewie?
Meg: ok mom, but if the phone rings and it's a boy. Please don't tell him I'm wrist deep in poopy. - MJfan119
It's funny 'cause it's true!
I love this! I always say it! And shapoopi hahahaha BUTT SCRATCHER! Family guy is totally awesome :-) oh god I need to go watch family guy now!
Love it! My fiance and I first bonded over our love of this show and still to this day randomly start shouting this line. Always brings a smile to both of our faces. Two Thumbs Up!
Get your buttscratcher here! :D
That is halariousV 1 Comment
This is by far my favorite moment of family guy
This and when Stewie says that he's always wanted to have a sexy party. He's great
Hi, this is Anne Curtis
..could you give us next time a quotes that is all about love? Haha.thank U..
Should definitely be higher up! I love this one!
That should be number one. The herpes from a toilet seat isn't even on here but should be second.
Love this one, especially Brian's reaction to it afterwardV 1 Comment
This is the best quote ever!
I can do a good herbert impression
Damn feel good to be leader
Herbert is just... wow
Reminds me of my husband and his friends. Peter griffin is my husbands alter ego for sure. I can relate to this show far too often.
Funny from season 8? I think
About diere jackson the female boxer, definitely one of the funniestV 1 Comment
Sad but true - Cosmic558
LOVE THIS ONE IT'S SO FUNNY LAUGHED HYSTERICALLY FIRST TIME
Nononononono I can't feel my legs welcome to the party mister oh wait there they are aww
WUT the HAYL?! No no no No no NOO! Haha don't take a bath while Peter is doing his daily shenanigans - MeaganSaysHI
Uh uh I don't get it... (Cleveland Show reference if you were wondering... )
This is just filler.. Zlsdkjf ;ilsr;xmclkv - alexschubert
This was around the time when Brian was used as a more intelligent character to Peter's idiocy. In any case, good stuff.
This quote is a true reminder of the inner idiot that lies within Peter Griffin
So true it is anoying even for a kid
So wrong but so funny... Quagmire needs is own show
Laugh out loud this episode makes me chuckle! Es
This should definitely have been first. My favourite one in the whole show!
And its on 50?! This and, 'oh harsh, you just got bumped down to coconut mint! '
I agree. This should be in the top 5!V 1 Comment
This just crosses so many lines on so many levels, it is just art!
After Peter get knocked over in a portable toilet.
This should be way higher on the list
Saw this last night for the first time - I was still laughing about it this morning!V 1 Comment
Funniest moment in Family Guy
Why is this not higher?
I couldn't stop laughing when I heard this
My day just went from alright to fantastic, how he comes up with this stuff
This is by far the best quote could have used this line so many times
This one is true
LOL SAVAGE!V 4 Comments
Oh my god peter has nevr been that immature has he? Who'd he say it to anyway
This was one of the best family guy moments ever, when peter goes feral and meg "saves" him
This was suppose to be number one.. I love this, and the face stewie makes when he says it.. Haha
Most definitely one of my favorite episodes ever!
Pure humor and idiotic behavior by Stewie. He's smarter than that, but that's what makes him so darn funny.
Sound's like somthing id say
This is funny no matter what show it's from - Game of Thrones even!
Should be number one comes up in every family guy conversation I've ever had
Say this all the time should be higher up... Along with saying stroke stroke stroke
Funniest Family Guy quote ever. Makes me laugh whenever I hear it and hear Hebert's lisp
Related ListsTop 10 Family Guy Quotes to Say More Often in Your Everyday Life Best Family Guy Characters Top Ten Best Family Guy Episodes Top 10 Family Guy Songs
12 years, 101 days old
Top Remixes (11)
2. Her fists are so dangerous she's not allowed to be a lesbian. - Brian Griffin
3. Eh, you're overreacting Lois and you can't spell overreacting without ovary... 'cause you're a girl. - Peter
2. Because you touch yourself at night - Museum tour guide to a child Peter Griffin after asking why the dinosaurs died
3. No Quagmire, we're not esupposed to! - Peter
2. Mum mum mum mum mummy mummy mummy mummy Lois........ Hi- Stewie
3. Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... Lois, this is not my Batman glass. - Peter Griffin
View All 11