Worst Mental Illnesses
There are voices and thoughts. They won't stop coming inside your head, no matter how hard you try. When I say quiet, they will talk again. My mom and other people repeatedly calling my name is the scariest. Even when you're silent, it's so noisy in your head like it's just going to explode. Then there goes shadow people peeping in the windows. I always had to close the windows and bring the curtains down so that they won't see me. I would avoid looking at the mirror sometimes because people coming from the other world might see me. I can't remember things properly. Like, what dress did I wear yesterday or earlier. I even experienced one time, when someone suddenly asked my name, I totally forgot. I paused to myself and had to look at the ID I was wearing to remember. Sometimes, I forget my birthday and age. I would prefer not to go outside much because I worry that intruders would go inside the house. I can't sleep because I can hear sounds that someone's trying to break down our ...more
I might have schizophrenia (not totally sure) and it sucks I have constant hallucination and delusions. I hear bombs guns screaming mumbling sometimes talking. I see little images that are not there, large light flashes, people chasing me, menacing shadows, people staring at me. I know that people are plotting against me, that I am being spied on, my thoughts are probably being broadcasted on radios, I am afraid to go on computers sometimes (obviously sometimes I can otherwise I wouldn't be here) because I think there might be built in guns. I'm 13. Not to mention, my speech is horrible, people usually understand me never and it's just really hard I can't show to sympathy even emotions I don't even have them it's bad I can't stand it I just want it to go away. I have been delusional since I was 6.
I have this and I only fear because nobody understands me. My parents are always angry to me because I am asocial. I stay up late. I isolate myself from people. I don't want to be seen. I don't listen to my parents. I can't concentrate in school... They really don't care that I have schizophrenia. They believe that I am lazy and need to be normal. But I can't fight schizophrenia. It is almost impossible to struggle with it. It ask so much energy than normal. I can't hold more than 3-4 days. It is even hard to take the first step. I can't cure myself although it is possible because it is a MENTAL illness. My life is very hard. I am hopeless about my future and I am afraid to become homeless if I go like this. I will still stay strong. My life is just very hard than I expected.
I've been a paranoid schizophrenic since I was 19 years old, so for 7 years so far. I'm extremely paranoid, self-isolated, and I'm delusional and have hallucinations. I've heard voices when I'm under a lot of stress but most of my hallucinations are tactile. At work, I can feel bugs crawling on my skin and in my hair, and I feel worms in my eyes. I have a 4-person dialogue going on in my head incessantly any time I'm not at home. They're silent voices that I communicate with telepathically. One that asks questions, one that answers them, one that explains the questions and answers, and one that tells me that people are watching me and talking about me. So far, I've wanted to cut off my fingers, chew off my arm, and I've gone missing for 2 days, and I've also tried to sever my spinal cord with a gun.
I have had OCD for 12 years now and its gradually got worst threw the years it started with irrational thoughts like I would get pregnant, possessed or my body and face would turn ugly, by the way I'm male and 24 years old. My compulsions involve flicking my fingers 4 times at the right time, kicking my feet and holding my breath to destroy anything that turns me manic but this happens everyday and every minute until I sleep and that's not even all of my compulsions. Dew to these problems I have had no girlfriend and no true friend. I am in so much agony with these, but I'm still happy because I am alive and healthy (physically). I have had no treatment or medication just suffered in silence but if you are reading this and you want help please ask someone.
I've had OCD since I was 9 and I got diagnosed with it when I was 12 (I'm 14 now). I didn't show much signs of it at 9 but looking back, I knew I had it back then and I still do. It sucks, I've had suicidal thoughts because of it and jumped off a bridge because of it and somehow survived. I have to wash my hands for an hour sometimes, it was so bad I skipped most of 7th grade, sitting in my room depressed because of OCD. It was so bad my dad also put me in a mental hospital thingy for teens, he also called the police because I was going so crazy because of it. I have OCD and a few other mental illnesses. But, this is one of the worst ones in my opinion.
Guys, please help me,
i'm an 11 year old and I THINK I might have OCD
I always walk in and out of doors, or sit and sit back down on chairs
I HAVE to arrange things in a specific order, and everything has to be straight, or else I have this weird feeling in my head. I hate this. I spend so much time looking at my desk to see if everything is in the right order
However, I don't have horrible thoughts, but I have to look out of the shower every time, because I have a feeling that a burglar is in the house. I also have to re read what I write, or re open a letter before I send it sometimes
i'm really upset about this and I hope someone will understand how I feel
So please, can someone with ocd tell me if I have it or not. Please
i'm just unsure because I don't have horrible thoughts of hurting anyone, having I fire or flood in house, or I don't have any feeling that someone will get hurt because of me. Please answer me. Thank you
Like one person said before, I have the symmetrical type OCD. Every single thing I do has to be even. Every morning I count how many swipes of deodorant I put on each arm, I freak out if I have to sit on the outside of people, it has to be even on both sides. If I chew gum I will literally have to to every single tooth back and forth back and forth like 40 times until it feels even enough, if someone high fives me they have to Higgins both hands or if they touch my body at all they have to touch the same exact spot on the opposite side and it can't be somebody else because I can feel the difference in temperature. It even happens with things that harm me such as someone hitting me or me hgetting hurt, if dope one punches me as hard as the possibly can, they have not lunch the other side too. In school I have to redo and redo and redo projects due to things not bright evenly spaced. I don't want to do any of this, I HAVE to do all of it.
I was diagnosed with BPD just last summer after I nearly took my life...The best way to describe it is my depression/anxiety build up over a period of time (few days/weeks) until suddenly something random triggers me and I break down into a catatonic mess...All of the feelings that have built up suddenly are released and I suddenly have extreme feelings of rage, disgust, hate towards myself...I spend the next 30-60 minutes sobbing/screaming/throwing things gradually feeling better afterward...The feeling you get feels as though you've been abandoned by everyone you love and that you deserve it...I'm typically an optimistic and extroverted person, but when a BPD Episode strikes I'm on the ground crying telling myself I'm worthless and I deserve to die
Borderline is absolutely horrific to live with. 10% of Borderlines commit suicide, and around 75% have attempted to commit suicide. Every moment you live is extremely intense. The fear of being alone and losing anyone takes over the mind. You are constantly juggling your overpowering emotions. When Borderline's fall into a breakdown, their actions can become dangerous to themselves, and anyone around them. Borderline Personality Disorder is like a package of mental illnesses and other health issues such as; eating disorders, depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, psychosis, neurological issues (minor short term memory loss).
"Product of years of my brother raping me, being abandoned constantly by friends and being abused by my parents. Coupled with my ADD and hypersensitivity, I am both the most caring and unmanageable person you can imagine. I lash out, get frustrated, can't tell between lies and truth, have constant paranoia, constantly blame myself and others at the same time... I can barely handle remedial tasks and I fixate on people so quickly it scares everyone away. I wish I was dead almost periodically every day and I have to age regress to keep from cutting. People look up to me, but I know they're all really looking down."
BPD is such a terrible, terrible thing. I am horrified at myself for the way I act toward myself and the way I treat others. I had a lot of cases in my childhood of being left behind by my parents and abandoned by my friends and they were some of my worst memories. It's such a strange disorder because I can't trust myself or anyone else. It's almost like my entire persona changes day by day or week by week. I have such powerful and explosive emotions that I slip into erratic, psychotic, and sometimes catatonic states. In some extreme cases, I've even dissociated and nearly got myself killed. All I want is to be loved and understood, but that's impossible when you can't love or understand yourself. I subconsciously pick friends that are emotionally fragile so I can get in their heads more easily and keep them close, then my impulsiveness can cause me to abuse them. I always present myself to be kind, talented, understanding, and respectable, so people are drawn to me, but I fear that ...more
I have Bipolar with psychosis and severe anxiety and I admit most of my time with this diagnosis I was embarrassed about it but not because of Bipolar itself, because people think it just means you're moody. COULDN'T BE MORE WRONG. Bipolar has the highest suicide rate above all other mental illnesses by a lot including borderline, depression and Schizophrenia. Bipolar feels like your brain is the rope in a Tug-Of-War match between Extreme mania and crippling depression. My first psychotic episode I saw demons and was convinced they were trying to kill me. It screwed up so much I had going for me, good grades, friends, and happiness. I spent all my hard earned money on useless junk, did weird things things that made me lose friends, I had violent urges (I didn't act on), hearing voices, not sleeping for days, seeing demons and alternative realities. My family "didn't believe" in mental illness and disowned me. I was homeless and bipolar I tried to kill myself then. Luckily I got help ...more
I'm a male (37 years) and I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder since I was 28. It's been 9 years I am taking medication and it was getting worse. I did many research on the internet for a long time and I think I found the permanent cure. It is simply meditation! Yes, I sit quietly (eyes closed with a straight spine and focusing on my breath) for 30 minutes twice daily. I simply put my headphones on and listen to relaxing meditative music which you can find on YouTube (I listen to Paul Collier's music and found it very relaxing!).
Now after 11 months of doing it, I reduced my medication by 50 percent! I am planning to stop my medication after 7 months (which means after 18 months of meditation).
Believe me, meditation can reverse any mental illness it is like a training for the mind! With meditation, I am now finally in the driver seat of my own mind and it's amazing! I wasn't like that when I was taking 100 percent of my medication dose (now am on 50 percent). So just ...more
I'm a 16 years old teen who had bipolar disorder and it's like living in hell. I can't control my actions/words/anything. I've lost sleep and I can't focus well I failed my year. I went to a doctor and she told me I have this mental disorder and since then people either made fun of me or pity me and I'm so sick of the same thing over and over again. Some people say they have it for fun but believe me if you don't then you're living in paradise. Mental disorders ain't fun and they're not something to joke about. Live happily if you're healthy and if not then I'm sorry that you have to go through this, you deserve happiness. Everyone does.
I am an extremely fortunate bipolar. I have a family who loves me dearly and that's number one. I don't smoke, don't drink (ever), go to sleep regularly, eat as regularly as possible, and always take my medicine. I am someone who does everything I am supposed to do to the T and I am still struggling 10 years later.
To get an idea who I am, I graduated at the top of my high school class and spoke at my graduation. I went to a preppy college, was getting good grades, and had a girlfriend until I had my first episode. Then, I jumped into the school fountain naked because some invisible voice told me to, I could talk to people telepatically, put my hand through solid objects, talk to turtles and experience the most extreme joy until I was balling my eyes out in front of terrified peers. I was full blown halucinating, which many people don't understand is part of a serious manic episode. I left college. I was able to finally finish my bachelors in a total of 7 years.
I have ...more
Depression is an overwhelming nothingness and apathy that envelops the victim and forces rapid deterioration from the inside out. Depression is similar to the process of termites consuming the core of a healthy tree, so that everything appears natural and beautiful on the outside, yet the center has already been hollowed by the deadly destruction. Suicide is when that tree collapses because of a lack of people who cared enough to support the degenerated tree. Depression is characterized by a pain so severe, that even through the prison of rational thought, an individual would commit suicide because nothing, not even the grief experienced by the person's loved ones, could possibly compare to the ever increasing agony. Depression is the knowledge that no matter how many medications are forced down one's throat, how many seemingly useless years of therapy the individual must endure, the plague will never cease to haunt and torture and massacre. Depression is not weak. Depression is not ...more
Depression is especially hard on me because I am shy. I am a coward. I am afraid to do anything that will possibly have an affect on me, and I am constantly pissed off at everyone for no reason. I've been going through this for years, and it is one of the worst feelings ever. I'm too afraid to get treatment because the last time I saw a counselor/therapist, someone called the cops on me. Depression is one of the worst pains ever, and it has turned me into a complete nervous wreck. I've gone through everything. Suicidal thoughts, sexual thoughts, uncontrollable anger, anxiety attacks, sadness, loneliness, everything. I just hope everyone can eventually pull through this ordeal.
I'm 14 Years old lets just say I haven't had the best of life... Depression is a curse and it hurts when you can't tell anyone that you have it... You have to be strong because you're the strongest and your friends are falling apart and your there to catch them but who is there to catch you? I have depression... According to my therapist and Physiologist They say I have the worst they have ever seen.. It's gotten so bad recently That my dad and mom have to convince me to get out of bed in the morning.. And when I do get up I have to put on this mask... a mask that has to fool everyone... I have scars on my body... scars of the stories that I will never tell... I'm the popular girl in school and yet nobody notices how broken I really am inside... With depression + the other things I have it is the worst thing to have... It kills you inside and my wish is how I wish that everybody wouldn't have to feel this but instead of a dream come true... My worst nightmares come alive
I have suffered from depression for multiple years. It got especially bad last year. I couldn't go to class, I was failing my classes, I couldn't function and I just wouldn't get out of bed. I self-harmed, and all I thought was how dying would be so much better. Imagine feeling this sad, empty, loneliness deep within you, that lasts for weeks, months, and you have no idea why. You can't get rid of it. It hits you unexpectedly and you don't know which day will be a good day and which day will be a bad day. Uncontrollable crying, anger, anxiety, hopelessness, feeling like a failure. And the worse part is that no one really takes depression seriously because the word is used so lightly these days.
I was diagnosed with asd when I was 17 which is strange but I struggled since an early age keeping friends as a kid with ADHD. This correlates because looking back I acted crazy because of ADHD, but when I finally took a mental note of my nonsense and told myself "ok I have to act normal now" going into high school, there was something of a blockage that kept me from saying what I wanted to say or present in a way that was expected from typical teens. The scariest part was I started to notice that I didn't know what to say and just wanted to prove to people that I could act normal. It bugs me when people say there's no normal. "What is normal?", they say. I'm saying, "your judgments of people say the answer loud and clear." Being incompetent in something that basically constructs your ego and confidence level is devastating.
I have autism. If you don't, just imagine this. You are in a world, where when things change, you can't change. And when it come to just basic communication, it is horrible. It's hard to make friends because you don't know what to say, and it's almost impossible to get a boy/girlfriend because you just freeze when you try to say something. I only have a medium-light autism, which isn't the worst thing in the world, but someone in my class has a very heavy version, and can barely talk, and has stayed back a lot of years. If you are looking at the heavy side of autism, it should be at least number 3, and even the medium light version I have is terrible. I do have friends, but they came very slowly, and I have never had a girlfriend and probably won't for a couple more years. Although it has all of these bad effects, there are also some good ones. You can remember things much better, but it's not always the things you want to remember. The worst part about autism is that people think ...more
I have pdd nos which is an autism spectrum disorder and was diagnosed when I was 3 1/2 and now I am 14 People don't notice it in me because I don't have echolalia and I don't have to go to any special needs classes. I have a really hard time expressing my thoughts out loud and even on paper. As I am writing this I don't really even know what to write. When I get super mad and feel the need to shout something, I don't know what to say. I also have very hard time understanding emotions. I don't know why someone would rather be happy than sad. To me, their kinda just the same. I get both emotions obviously, but I can't really understand them. I have a lack of empathy which is something people get confused with sympathy. Sympathy is feeling for someone while empathy is feeling with someone. For example, sympathy is feeling bad for someone when they are having a bad day while empathy is feeling good because you made someone happy. When I do good things to others I don't feel happy with ...more
Its hard to live normally when you suffer from autism and the worst thing is that no one really understands you. I'm 16 years old and I feel like I've had communication problems all my life. People like to say I'm an introvert, and that I have very bad social skills, which is true because for someone like me, expressing thoughts and feelings is really hard. Understanding other people's emotion is like reading a chinese dictionary. It's hard to relate to people, and it's extremly difficult to read/understand facial expressions. People always say that I'm socially retarded, which isn't true but for someone who rarely makes eye contact and always understands things literally and doesn't get jokes, expressions or metaphors, it's not hard to see why. Hearing clearly what others are saying is strangely challenging because I feel like all I can hear are noise, thus making people believe that I'm a bad listener. Finally I always struggle with not getting distracted by the slightest sound. ...more
Not everybody with ASPD is "evil". One of my friends has this disorder but is high-functioning and hasn't committed a minor felony ever since he was in his mid-teens. Therapy is doing wonders for him to control his impulsive urges and at least practice cognitive empathy. He has no intentions of manipulating or hurting people and usually keeps to himself, and smokes hella weed. It saddens me how much misconceptions about this disorder people are spewing out in this comment section. Not all people with a cluster b disorder are abusive monsters and people who don't suffer from a cluster b personality disorder can have the capability to be abusive and manipulative as well, even neurotypicals.
I think this disorder should be #1. And it has nothing to do with if the person can get to work on time or keep a steady job. It has to do with its consistent "manipulative" nature due to the inability to feel empathy for others. This disorder was formerly called "psychopath," meaning psychologically damaged. I have severe OCD and am on the bipolar spectrum, and during one of my manic episodes, I met an antisocial personality disorder sufferer. I thought he was bipolar at first, but he quickly picked up what I liked, and emulated it perfectly. I smoked pot last night while I was hanging out with him (he did not smoke) and I started recognizing that he does not meet the "criteria" for bipolar disorder. His eyes were what gave away his disorder, they were empty when he was not trying to impress me.
An ASPD person can be in a long-term relationship with someone and have children with that person and then completely destroy all there lives on a whim (or many, continuous whims). They can appear nice enough for long periods of time, as long as their companion is on their internal list of people they find useful. As soon as that changes or they get bored enough to want a thrill, they reveal their inner monster and can start having sex with numerous strangers they find online and poisoning their long-time companion and endangering and lying to their children. All because it gives them a sick pleasure. And claiming it's their companion who is crazy the whole time. The heart of evil.
There is this woman my dad's age in my city who has this mental illness.
She has had such a very very sad and tragic life and I cannot believe she is still alive after everything she has been through and 53 years of alcohol abuse. Never had a happy moment in her life. I think once she dies the public will be relieved they gotten a much needed vacation from her constant offending and that there is no more pain and suffering for her. No one can help her get better.People think she is homeless because she has a horrible appearance but she's in a nice setting. She has abused substances since she was 6. I always assumed she had schizophrenia but when I saw in the newspaper she was an antisocial offender that's how I worked out what mental illness she has. She has so many convictions to her name and has been trespassed from most places
I have multiple personality disorder and I believe it should be#2 on this list I have 3 alternate personalities besides me and its hell having this disorder because one minuet your fine and your you then the next thing you know its been days or weeks that another personality has been out and you didn't even kniw it was happening. One of my alternates would cut my arms from my wrist half way down my arm both arms and my mom or husband would find me just laying and the bathroom now I can't even stand a paper cut so I know I couldn't do that to myself so it would be days or maybe the next day I would come back too and my arms would be wrapped up and hurting and burning so bad and I didn't know what was going on, that same alternate made me overdose and be and a coma for 11 days it just caused harm to me. My protective alternate Hannah she comes out when something is too hard or difficult for me or my mind too handle then she comes out to deal with the conflict and usually causes more ...more
It's now called Dissociative identity disorder. I personally believe it should be higher. All mental illnesses are bad but some of the illnesses ahead of this are side effects of this disorder. It's hell because you feel trapped inside, you can't trust anyone especially yourself. You could seriously hurt someone or yourself. I'm not sure the exact statistics but people with this disorder have one of the highest suicide numbers among mental illnesses.
I don't if it's for real but I think I had this kind of mental illness, it happens almost every time that I drasticly change phases, my friends always say at first I was too kind, smiling and laughing with. Then suddenly, out of the blue I became irritable and very impatient. And I know I'm not that kind of person, I am very self absorbed. My college classmates told me I was a loner. Now I don't who's the real me, the kind hearted, the loner, or the war freak.
This is definitely. the worst! You don't know who you are. You are like 5 persons(different from person to person) in one person. You can wake up and go to school, then suddenly change into another person. when you com home from school and become yourself, you can't remember a damn thing of what happened the whole day at school. You switch person like you switch mood. I feel so bad for these people... I recommend the T.V.-serie Kill Me Heal Me. An amazing story about a person with DID(Multiple Personality Disorder). So worth it, and tear shredding.
Yeah, I got anxiety, its horrible I go to school everyday feeling scared and worried that people might judge me, I got bullied for only 2 days but I tried getting myself out but they keep coming at me for an apology, they know I have anxiety and want me to look bad in front of people. Sometimes I wish I was dead, like I said, they tried apologizing but I said "I'm not forgiving", after what they did.
Anxiety is a pain
I've had this since birth, but I only found out about 6 months ago. When I look back, I now believe that I have had this since birth. I thought it was normal to have felt the feelings that I did, but most people would always outdo me in everything the slightest bit nerve-wracking. I am 14 now, and in my case, it is not really that bad, considering what I have heard from other people. I have a moderate-severe level and I find that to be terrible. I can't even imagine the people who have this but on a much more severe level. Before, I thought that I was just more careful, but even the most careful of people would outdo me. It takes literally 30 minutes to jump off of an 8-foot ledge. It literally took 30 minutes to convince me to do that. Plus, I have a phobia of heights, so yeah. I can't go higher than 20 feet without getting nervous. Like one person before me said, NO ONE DESERVES THIS!
Basically imagine that feeling you have when your about to fall out of a chair but you don't quite. That's what it's like to have a panic attack but for much much longer. And if you have anxiety you can have quite a few of those a week. These disorders can drive you crazy. I was diagnosed with it when I was 6 and I wouldn't eat, drink, sleep, or go anywhere just because of the fear of the unknown. I almost had to get fed with IVs because I wouldn't eat and it was so horrible! No matter what I ever get this will always be the worst because I can't get it to go away. I'm 11 now and it's gotten a little better, I eat now, but still. The stuff that lives in my brain is worse than any creature in this planet. People can't really understand the stuff people with anxiety go through. Because there is no way to know what it's like until you've had it, and once you've had it there's no way to really shake it and it lives with you forever. If I could wish for one thing in the world it would be ...more
I have had anxiety my entire life. Since I was a kid. We first thought I was just shy but when I started getting panic attacks we looked into it. It's like that feeling when you fall backwards on a chair, that quick 3 second feeling you get, your heart races, you can't breathe, you break out in a sweat, you feel like you're drowning-except it obviously much longer. Talking to people is a chore, leaving the house is a chore, going shopping doing normal things and having people tell you to 'just get up' is awful. Finding support can be hard and anxiety in general is terrible. You never know when its coming, it just comes and it leads to things like depression, OCD and insomnia. I spend nights crying and stressing, having panic attacks all alone in my room. Crying at school and avoiding everything. I can't have fun when I go places because I fear people will judge me.
I've had this ever since I was 5, and it has tormented my life to the fullest. I stopped eating with my parents, I couldn't even be in the same room as them without earplugs. I go everywhere with earplugs, and as for school I have my own classroom that I spend 80% of the time in except for when I'm getting instructions from teachers. People annoy me so much, with so many sounds and even more sounds that come every year. At the age 15 I obtained a repetitive tick, whenever someone makes a sound I have to make it right after so It doesn't torment my mind that much. Eventually though students catch on and start making the sounds on purpose because they find it funny. With that being said I sill can't tell many people, afraid that they would call me a drama queen or it's not a real disorder. Or how they compare to them not liking a few sounds to what I have, which is not comparable. When these sounds get repetitive this huge urge to kill the person is unbearable, I feel disgusted with ...more
I have Misophonia along with a little Autism (further down the list). Let me just say it's tough and it's a huge burden. I have been to SEVERAL behavioral hospitals before my mom could figure out what was wrong with me, even after I've been to lots of them. My sadistic father always tormented me about it. Once someone finds out you have Misophonia, they'll start making noises on purpose. I scare myself and I'm always isolated from everyone and everything. Yes, people have been quite retarded about the fact I can't tolerate noises. Every time someone made a noise or did something (purpose AND accident) I physically attacked them. It's not like a really had control over myself, you wouldn't believe the anger and emotion that just erupts and explodes. There's always screaming. There are so many holes in my walls. All I hear from people are noises that bring out my monster. Just because you haven't heard of it, DOES NOT mean I don't have Misophonia.
MISOPHONIA: When everything is ...more
I have had misophonia since I was 12 now and from a year of having it you learn a lot. I can't eat with my family at dinner time, I can't sit and share snacks with my friends at sleepovers. The amount of anger that immediately comes from deep inside me, I can't handle. I get told off for getting wound up by small sounds at the dinner table, I've been laughed at for crying in pain that it deeply upsets me to hear things like hat. And when I meet someone who understands I will be so happy because I have felt so alone for months and it's not helping.
I've had a problem with this condition my entire life. When I was little, I would have panic attacks if my parents took me to a loud place. One time, when I was four, during a firework show, I ran away. Now I avoid movie theaters and hate going to restaurants because the sound is unbearable. I don't like sitting with friends because I start to get overwhelmed. I'll start having angry outbursts when I hear someone smacking or breathing too loudly, and I get the impulse to strangle them. This disorder is both annoying and depressing.
During REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep, which is when we have dreams, the brain released a chemical that freezes your body. (I don't remember why.) Sleep paralysis occurs when an individual is half awake during REM sleep. Since you cannot move or speak, you are temporarily paralyzed. Since we experience dreams during REM sleep, the individual has visions. Reports say that victims say that they hear voices, or see paranormal creatures. Such as demons. Some also report having the feeling of flying, or being dragged out of bed. And noises such as hissing, zapping, or humming can also be experienced. Some cases of sleep paralysis are sleep deprivation, phycological stress, or abnormal sleeping cycles.
Sleep paralysis is scary. I remember having it once before. I woke up at like four in the morning, when I realized that I couldn't move. I thought it would ware away after a few seconds but it didn't. I started hearing really loud whispers then I started to see things. It was like a shadow was hiding behind one of the walls and was just staring at me. I wanted to scream but I couldn't. I couldn't even talk. In that moment I felt like I was gonna die. But the worst feeling was that I was really tired but I couldn't fall asleep because I thought that if I slept I would die. Sleep paralysis is one of the most scary experiences I had ever experienced.
HOW is this below schizophrenia? With schizophrenia, you can still walk around when you hallucinate... but with this... you can't WAKE UP this is a horrible thing to have, whoever created this list shame on you, this should be #1
Oh god. I can only imagine how horrible it will be. Every human being gets this once or twice in there lives but some poor,poor people gets this nightmare once a week. The shadow people are creepy as hell. If you get this, you will be terrified of your own shadow
This disorder is crazy! I was into psychology until I saw this! I have PSD... I am 12 years old and I am so afraid of my loved ones to die... I'm afraid to lose them... This is just plain hell! I sleep every night thinking about my loved ones if they die and I will cry... its almost everyday! This is one of my worst experience! I feel like losing my mom because she always gets mad at me for small reasons I just cannot handle but cry thinking what if she leaves me? What if she loves him more than me? (I have no dad but my mom has a boyfriend) I love my family and friends but I don't feel it anymore... I can't feel anything but sadness and anger inside... and yes I laugh but only in the outside. Life is meaningless with these.
I can't believe this isn't up higher. The worst thing about PTSD is that it is a never ending disorder. All day I swivel my head back and forth and always assume the worst things are going to happen to everyone around me. It makes it impossible to get close to people, because the closer I get the more fearful I become I will lose them. You never know when your trigger will appear and when it does it can throw you out of your life for days at a time. I'm scared to get out of bed everyday because I'm afraid of the world. I have insomnia that is linked to PTSD and all I can do all night is think of all the different scenarios in which the people I love will die. I'm always exhausted but I still do things to be safe. I check everyone at all times to make sure everyone is safe, and it kills me when my friends do even little things like ride without a seatbelt on. The flashbacks can be debilitating and come with no warning. During a test, a conversation with a friend, at work talking to ...more
I'm honestly shocked this isn't up higher because it's one of the most debilitating of my myriad of mental illnesses. I actually have C-PTSD as opposed to PTSD, the difference being while PTSD is caused by a very specific event, C-PTSD stems from long term, repeated abuse. Due to it's long term nature and the many different evironments and experiences I had in those years, I've been left with innumerable amounts of triggers. I get terrible night terrors where I wake up screaming and that's only when I can fall asleep seeing as flashbacks haunt me every time I try to close my eyes. My flashbacks are rarely visual, but are often overwhelming duplications of the extreme distress I was feeling in my traumatic events and while I can occasionally recognize that it isn't happening to me now, I can never seem to separate my current feelings from my only ones. Socializing with people and especially trying to get close to new one's is always quite an event. I can't seem to focus on anything but ...more
My dad has Complex PTSD which is worse because it comes with a hole lot of other things too. This should be at the top with schizophrenia and bipolar. He has had it for about 13-14 years now and the doctors don't do much for him. He got it from a horrible childhood where his family mentally and physically abused him. It is one of the worst things you could ever live with and it's untreatable. I am lucky to have him though because most people what it just commit suicide. It is also worse with people who get it from childhood not a soldier in the war because soldiers get it from soldiers so they have been trained to kill where's just getting it from a bad childhood is way worse. It's horrible for anyone still I'm not saying that it's not horrible for soldiers. But my dad was diagnosed with it when I was scolded in hospital and almost died in 2003 where he got flashbacks from his childhood. He also has obsessive compulsive disorder, fibromyalgia, severe depression and a huge list of ...more
They are always that silent killer. There's always early signs, that are often thrown off as 'just growing up, losing baby fat, trying to get healthy' but until it's physically present- it's so easy to ignore and hide. Often you are oblivious to ever having it, until it's consumed you completely. I didn't realize there was anything actually wrong with me at all, I didn't even really know what it was. My parents waited until I was 8 stone and started asking me if I was bulimic. And I had no idea what bulimia was, I just thought the only type of eating disorder was one where you starved or threw up. And I hadn't given any of them any thought, I'd never really seen anyone with one-besides celebrities. Maybe because I thought they didn't effect me. Well if everyone had that attitude we'd be living in ignorance, I realise now. Besides all these mental disorders, ignorance is the biggest killer.
Eating disorders slowly kill you. Everyday is a struggle. Stepping on the scaled multiple times a day and crying at your reflection in the mirror becomes at daily routine. Eating disorders are such a painful experience and are very difficult to recover from. When you have an eating disorder it is very difficult to talk about. I had been thinking about telling a friend about my eating disorder for a long time because it was so hard to keep it all to myself and I felt so alone. I remember one night my friend slept over and we were having a deep conversation in the middle of the night. We were drunk and she asked me what one thing that no one knew about me that I keep secret. Immediately my eating disorder popper in my head but I hesitated. I told her I didn't have one and she said she didn't believe me. I will never forget that feeling of how hard it was to talk about my bulimia out loud. In some cases even drugs can't help. One time I remember I was really high and I got the munchies. ...more
Eating disorders affect so many things in your life, it feels like cancer and your brain feels like schizophrenia. You get so weak it's difficult to walk. And unlike depression or schizophrenia eating disorders are dismissed like they're not important. one time in my ED I passed out in the snow and woke up sweating. I couldn't crawl to the refrigerator to get a sip of orange juice. There's so much shame and guilt because you feel like it's your fault. Every single day you literally have to force yourself to eat something. That is a tactic illegal to use against terrorist because it's inhumane. And yet I have to do it 6 times a day
Has no one here ever had an eating disorder. They are damned if you do and damned if you don't. Weight going up and you want to hurt every inch of your being. The torment never shuts up, it renders you physically incapable. Incapable of doing one of the most basic human survival instincts- eating. You hurt your family and your friends and you lose everything your mind cannot think of anything else. The thoughts never shut up. There is nostalgia for being at your 'sickest' failure for not doing well enough in destroying yourself. Being forced to eat is traumatising. Eating makes you want to die, not eating and being stuck in a pointless cycle of starvation and weight loss makes you want to die. Either way you're screwed. I have depression anxiety and anorexia. If I could get rid of one it would be the hell that is the eating disorder.
Its like being tied to a chair and tortured your entire life. By midgets. Constant yammering auditory hallucinations who spend their time telling you they can steal your personality traits and characteristics. I walk around with a headache all day and sometimes have trouble concentrating. You can't really hear or see perfectly all the time either if the hallucinations become too powerful.
I noticed that a lot of the time the stuff they're saying has a significance to the present or obvious future. Usually they'll jay embarrass me but I can usually find a good reason for what they're talking about in the room. That's how I always know it's a delusion. My brain seems to know what going on, but for some reason it has to talk constantly.
If I get nervous or feel the pressure of anxiety my brain picks extreme topics to hallucinate about like terrorism or violence, or sometimes character defects. I can't always feel everything with my body like walking or moving. And sometimes ...more
It's been a few months since I was released from the hospital for my first major psychotic episode. I've been bipolar for almost ten years since my world changed with constant depersonalization at age 12. Nothing ever feels real, I barely feel any emotions except anxiety now when I start to think about what's left for my future. That's not entirely true actually, I sit on either end as manic (very confident and sometimes very aggressive, though that's more related to psychosis) and feeling like nothing matters (depressed). If it weren't for my parents I would probably be homeless without medication. For some people that's a reality which horrifies me. I feel like I've experienced almost every mental illness except personality disorders but this is my diagnosis. I have rare moments where I just feel normal, but the depersonalization never goes away. I would never wish this on anybody.
This disorder doesn't have as many votes as the others because it doesn't receive as much attention in the news or media. I actually have bipolar 1, which has been terrible for me. I've spent five months of my life psychotic, been involuntarily committed three times due to severe mania, and have had years of depression. I've lost nearly everything I've valued in life due to this illness. I could vote for my illness, and also for scizophrenia, as my grandma had that disorder and I can see how it devastated her life, but schizoaffective disorder is a combination of the two. I have periods of normalcy between my manias and depressions, and my grandma didn't have to deal with the mood swings. I only have psychosis when I'm manic, but those suffering from schizoaffective disorder can have psychosis even when they are not manic or depressed. It's not as well known as the others, but I imagine schizoaffective disorder is the worst.
At first I was diagnosed with bipolar and depression, but it only got worse. This disorder is terrible. Not only do I have voices in my head, I also have the mania and depression of bipolar disorder. I have felt like I was being followed by the police, that I was God, that I had given everyone AIDs even though I don't have it, that I had special powers and can talk to people through my head, that I was extremely good looking (which I am not haha) and every girl wanted me, that I could talk to people through the T.V., that the world ended and we are all in Hell, and that my best friends were all apart of a secret organization trying to kill me. This illness has ruined all of friendships and has made life completely unlivable. I have tried to commit suicide once, and have thought about commiting suicide everyday. People think I am crazy and well I am. The amount of pain that goes into this disease is insane. The fact that both bipolar and schizophernia are rated higher then this really ...more
Say whatever horrible things you want about OCD or ADHD or Depression or Bipolar or hell even Schizophrenia. At least with those disorders, even despite all the immense challenges victims go through, you can still say you're "living in the real world."
Whereas, having a dissociative episode is the equivalent of DYING, then coming back to life and having to start all over again. It's confusing, scary, and most of all life destroying. There's nothing that even minisculy compares to it. Everything that exists one moment just disappears, whether or not it actually does, but that doesn't matter because your thoughts are completely devoid of anything.
And even putting aside the actual episode, while you experience this, it completely impairs your ability to do... anything! Loss of focus, loss of coherent speech/thoughts, depletion of motivation, difficulty with motor movements, anxiety, catatonia in the most severe cases, and there's probably a few more I'm ...more
Feels like a bad trip, but it doesn't go away and you have to act normal around people even though you're not really there. Nothing feels real, everything looks like you're looking through a glass bowl, you can't understand what people say to you, you can't remember what you just did. Flourescent lights, people, anxiety, excitement, changes in environment trigger my symptoms. Sometimes I just wake up with it. Most people have it coexisting with another disorder... mine's bipolar depression. It turns your world up side down. You lose your future because you don't really exist anymore. How can you work, have children, even clean the house if you are not really here?
I have anxiety that later was followed by DID. Probably one of the most difficult disorders to explain, it's like nothing is real, you're just in a dream. It's difficult to think straight and it's horrifying. I always have panic attacks while experiencing this because I don't feel in control, I feel like I'll mess something up because I have no idea what's happening but at the same time I know everything that is happening and I can't do anything about it. This disorder gives me grief because I am a dancer and whenever I am performing this happens and it's horrible because my mind just blanks yet my body keeps moving. The only perfect description I can think of, it's like a zone out, or you're just watching yourself from a screen. I get this on and off thr. oughout the day and then can't even remember what "normal mode" feels like. Whenever this is happening it sucks because I don't feel like I'm actually experiencing the things I am. I hope my description helped your understandings.
This is like if you have no personnality, you just have you, the robot who does whats it's socially right to do, and the other, the alter-ego, who is psychadelic and totally empty, like a black hole in your head, no conscience no thougths, just an intuitive fear that paralyzes you. So all your memories or looks like someone else's or horror, and you feel bad because all the people your supposed to love, you can't feel anything for them, it's not you, and you don't even have the impression they're real, all is just a dream, but you can't wake up, never ever. This should definitely be number one.
I apparently have this disorder. Perhaps on a good day, such as today, I will agree with you. Yes, I have psychosis. But when everyone (the "hallucinations") are talking to me it's hard to ignore them and act normally; when they're poking me in class and telling me that the teacher is going to kill us all or that I'll fail my classes, obviously it's distressing. I've had these "symptoms" since I was about 7, now I'm 15. The disorder can hurt, physically and mentally, it can be cunning and confusing and down right evil. I often cannot even tell what I made up and what's real, it's the same to me; but nobody can see it, my pain isn't even real.
Well, I think it is not quite as severe as schizophrenia, considering this is the symptom of it, but this still is awful. It is considered critical, too. I used to have these episodes due to faulty medication, and remembered none of them. I was violent, unresponsive, delusional, immature, all of that. Worse? They could not help because of my hostility! Though schizophrenia is obviously worse (most severe mental illness people), this still is awwwful.
I have schizophrenia and yeah psychosis is literally like on earth. I believe that I was monitored by a secret society from my school to harm me in the near future. Because of that I didn't trust anyone in my school, wouldn't talk to them, lost all my friends, and wanted to change school. I mostly stayed at home because I feel very safe there. I also heard voices about telling me I was worthless or saying that they are out to get me, and once I saw a black silllouhette saying that they've been monitoring me through my older brother and then yeah things got pretty bad, but now its controllable, might never know when I will have a relapse but time will tell. Psychosis is a very very very scary thing to have.
I was Diagnosed with Brief Psychotic Disorder at the age of 16 and I've had to live with relapsing episodes for years. Schizophrenia may be bad but any psychotic disorder is just as bad if not worse at times.
It's probably one of the worst things that has happened to me. Wanting to get out of the bed is tough, and going through the day is even worse. I am at a constant battle with my mind, where it's always my mind that wins. I feel worthless, ugly, and a failure. It isn't all fun and games which can be solved by love as shown in so many movies. It does include the stereotypical body insecurities, but also much more. Insecurities about whether I do have a future, am I even cared for, do I even matter, my looks, my personality, my intelligence and EVERY damn thing there is to think about. It forces me to do self harm, and I feel like I am doing the right thing by punishing myself. Yes, there are suicidal thoughts too, and they grow worse as the days pass on. My studies are affected, my social life is affected, all of it, negatively.
It's incredibly hard to talk to people about it, mainly because more than half of the time they don't believe you. But yeah, depression doesn't look at ...more
This should be higher! My best friend from grade 1-4 had clinical depression, and it was painful having to hear him say "I don't need to live" he was called fat by some idiots back in 2015! even though he was a little tall for his age. He wasn't depressed until last year, where he was quite moody sometimes. I asked what the problem was and he told me he was diagnosed with clinical depression. This is where I started to feel bad, really bad. Every day he was in a bad mood, I was concerned and kind of scared of what he'll do in the future. I really didn't want one of my best friends to commit suicide! I would be really sad if he did. whenever he was angry, he would have meltdowns about certain things such as people judging and torturing him. I tried not to feel emotional because I didn't wanna hear things like that! He hated my second best friend (AJ) because he told him something about Jeff The Killer. I don't wanna talk about that because that'll upset AJ (if he's reading this) ...more
You're life no longer has any moments of joy or happiness, moments considered happy by others pass without recognition to you and all you really want to do is sleep. Life is boredom and tiredness
I'm not selfish enough to commit suicide but everyday I wish the end of the world would come and take me out of this living nightmare.
I have a friend who has this, and the only reason people aren't writing a comment on Clinical depression is probably because they haven't had it... and that's why there aren't many comments...
I live with anxiety everyday, no medication works. Unlike other mental illnesses you can use medication and it might actually do something.
I have never worked, I don't go out, I'm 20 and I've been like this for years. School was a nightmare. Everything is a nightmare. I can't eat normally, I have insomnia because of it, it constantly feels like I'm dying.
I think everyone hates me because I can't do things, no one talks to you, or even cares about how you feel because it's not a "real illnesses".
My doctor is useless and refuses to help.
Sleeping tablets don't work! I've tried so many and they just ware of after a couple days.
I was diagnosed with this when I was ten or eleven. It caused me to become physically sick and develop several phobias, many of which I'm still dealing with today. I think my first and worst fear was vomit, which I developed somewhere from age six to eight. I also become physically sick or face intense fear when faced with corners I have to turn (spooked easily because of ADHD, had it all my life), sexual intercourse (feels like committing an unpardonable sin, caused by upbringing, developed around age 12 when I became sexually active), elevators (thanks to the Rockefeller building, developed at age 15), or anything with a steep uphill climb. When I was younger, I had a fear of being left alone, so much to where I would sleep under my youngest sister's bed without her knowledge so I could actually drift off. I think I was desensitized to that by having to be alone for long periods of time. I am currently 19 and attending college as a junior this year. I have my own psychiatrist now, ...more
I have Gad, it's like living a prison. I worry about everything and I can't control them. When I'm at school I don't do anything because I'm so afraid of failing it or doing it wrong, when my mom is late from work I start worrying she got into a car accident, I constantly watch my family members pretty much every single minute I have them just so I make sure they don't die. I lost a lot of friends because of this, they refer me as a "whiny 8 year old" because of my mental illness, very hard to live with. Sometimes I start thinking I don't even deserve a place on earth
Normal anxiety is usually confused with this. It is just so not the same. I was diagnosed with GAD some time ago, and it has been one of the hardest things I've ever been through. It is like a bee, buzzing inside your head every single minute of your day, reminding you how trapped you are. Symptoms vary from person to person, but I think they are all similar in the way that they are like your own personal hell. For me, it reminded me that no body really took me seriously, and nobody really tried to understand the way I felt, always accusing my thoughts and feelings of being way too teenagerish. So, when the first anxiety I ever had, came, my closest ones just thought I was being weak, sensible, irrational. I thought it was over, but then the attacks came back, again and again, and all I could do was cry my eyes out all night, because I was alone and nobody understood. Normally, after experiencing the attack, I left the room I used for crying, and looked for my parents and the ...more
I'm the victim of my mother's Münchhausen Syndrome by proxy and it has left me with a multitude of mental illnesses such as PTSD and even more false diagnoses. Her chosen method was a bit unconventional in the fact that she favored manipulating my mental health than anything physical. Since I was a child I've suffered from chronic depression and anxiety and as I got older it really started to take a toll on me which she so conveniently utilized to force me into a series of forced psychiatric hospital stays. Some of those stays lasting well over a month because my mother refused to take me home insisting I was still a danger to myself. One of the most damaging false diagnoses I received was SchizoAffective Disorder when my mom decided to tell the psychiatrist I was seeing I heard voices. I was placed on so many medications the exacerbated my depression and left me with crippling side effects and they refused to take me off the medications. Any time I met a therapist or a psychiatrist ...more
This mental illness should be in the top tens. It's a really bad one. Parents with this disorder try to make their kids sick just for attention. There are dozens of crimes of parents making their kids sick and killing them
Munchausen's by proxy is like hidden child abuse that no one notices until it's too late. It is so sad not just for the child but for the parent/guardian/carer whoever.
Worse than schizophrenia
I have ADHD. I struggle with paying attention in school or discussions because I keep daydreaming and the stuff is too boring. I get bad grades in school because of ADHD. And I keep procrastinating in homework because I'm always on other websites (I'm writing this comment while homework now, LOL). I try to focus in homework, but I just can't. I've tried a few times but got distracted easily. I'm always on websites slacking off and losing free time. I also get distracted by noise around me. I have to go to this boring special "help" class after school and I get pulled out of class twice a week. I'm also very antisocial in school as I don't have much friends. I wish that I was a normal kid. :'(
Its one of the most painful thing one can endure...I have it myself..I struggle to sit I struggle to sleep I struggle to do anything involve resting..I can't focus as even the most little bit of interest such as a noise or a movement hinders me to get distracted I constantly feel like I'm trapped in my mind and I really wanna control myself but I can't and to make it all the more worse is when one scolds you for it...you start to feel terrible so it affects u mentally physically and emotionally
A one-way trip to insanity, you lose your mind, your hope, your soul, your mind flies off to mars and your common sense is shattered. You have no idea what's going on, nobody understands, constant hallucinations that you can't really see, but also CAN see in your mind, a result of an overloaded, way too imaginative mind. People treat you like you know nothing. Always in the lower education groups because you fail to pay attention, but your mind has... well... A MIND of its own. - An 11-year-old ADHD sufferer
I have ADHD too. People say it isn't that bad or it's easy. If I hear any noise that's all I concentrate on because I can't focus on more than one thing at once. I also have an awful temper to the point of a lot of suspension for violence and threatened to be expelled and arrested. People will put a lot of pressure on me and make me try as fast as possible to get work done and I can't do it. I often fail classes and in total have failed 20+ classes in my life. Around 10 it was part of the cause of my suicidal attempt and I've had 4 so far after that. It has led me to become Psychotically Depressed. Psychotic Depression is awful. Considering even the littlest amount of depression is living hell. It has caused insomnia so I can no longer sleep at night and get about 2 in the day. I'm inside almost 24/7 and don't speak to people often. I have had moments where I get up and start pacing and thinking of killing myself and planning it out. Like I said I've tried 4 times. I've also tried ...more
I've had tourette syndrome since I was 9 and it is NOT fun! I always have to twitch my jaw, neck, eyelid, or have to crack my knuckles. And if I don't, I gut this horrible feeling that I don't know how to describe until I do something. My mom hates it when I twitch like I always have since 3rd grade, but I always tell her I can't help it. It's kind of true that I can't help it though... And I sometimes laugh for no reason, too! I am not sure if THAT has anything to do with Tourette or not, but I've also been doing that since 3rd grade, and got in trouble. Little does my mom or 3rd grade teacher know that I have touettes... Well, now my mom understands because dad found out and dxplained it to mom. But still, you should NEVER wish for tourette syndrome. It is horrible and I feel like it shouldn't be this close to the bottom and be at least little closer to the top!
I have had Tourettes since I was four. It is a terrible thing. Imagine you got bitten by a mosquito. You want to scratch, but you know if you do, you'll start bleeding, but you want to scratch so badly! That's how I describe my Tourettes. You want to tic because the urge is taking over all of your thoughts. But you know that you might hurt yourself or make other people stare at you.
This disorder is extremely common, but so many people don't know about it. And if they do, they might stereotype it as "the cursing syndrome", even though cursing is rare and motor tics are common. I remember I would make all of these movements with my face, and it would weird me out because I had little control over it. The doctor told me I had Tourettes. When I was eleven, I had begun to have vocal tics, and it only gets worse with stress. I'm not surprised Tourettes was low in rating, because not too many people know about it. But in my opinion, there should be more awareness for this disorder, ...more
I have it physically. Imagine that you have to crack your knuckles, and until you do, you have this horrible nagging feeling in your head until you do. It's weird to have to constantly stretch my legs until they hurt, just so I can feel slightly comfortable. It's a ton of things. Sniffing my upper lip, holding my nose to warm it up, cracking my jaw constantly. It's agony. I got it in 1st grade, and have had it since.
I was surprised to see this is on the bottom. Seriously imagine being in class and you can't stop making random noises like clearing your throat or nonstop sniffing. Sometimes the tics even cause self harm like forcing your nose up with your hand.
I always was called out by my mom because I lacked empathy, had a huge ego, and thought I was better than everyone else. I craved attention, and those girls in my classes who got it instead of me were instantly on my list of hatred. I'm extremely sensitive, and I need others to constantly compliment me to make me feel better about myself. It really does suck, because all I've done is just speak without thinking and then ruin my chances of getting any new friends. I don't even know if I have the personality disorder, to be honest. Whenever I tell my parents about it, they say that I'm only overreacting. My dad said that a narcissist only cares about them-self, and he says that I'm far from it. But, I really do care only about myself, little about others, and it makes me feel horrible. People call me a narcissist all of the time, but I don't want to believe it. I'm only 13. Maybe I'm just highly insecure.
I consider myself a narcissist, I lack all empathy, remorse, and most of all guilt. I find it very easy to make fake emotional connections to people around me and just cut them off and end them without a second thought. I think of everyone else in the world as a pawn for my games. I am extremely intelligent and have an inflated ego but ONLY because people always call me attractive. I can fake emotions effectively, and do so to manipulate and lie. My romantic relationships mean nothing to me, they are again just a pawn in my games in order to get something or for them to do something for me.
I had a brother with this personality disorder. He was a nightmare, he barely really cared about anyone, he's jealous of pretty much everyone who has a better life than him and he tries everything to prove he's better than them
Friend has this. He's jealous of everyone yet he has had awesome girlfriends and just not messaged them back. It's like he loaths his existence without depression weird. But he's my bro. Little booze will solve it!
Wouldn't it be horrifying to want to sleep, but not be able to, and this continues until you are dead? I feel sorry for everyone that has it.
I don't have this but I feel sorry for people that have this.
Personally it sucks and I'm most of the time tired at all times of the day it stops me from functioning normally and makes it harder in school I hope nobody has it but it's hard to tell such a big lie to yourself
I have spd and all I really want to do is be alone because then I don't have to be anything. I'm only 18, life is going slow and I'm tired of not feeling anything, sometimes its great because nothing can phase me, but its just like floating through life, no dreams or ambitions, all I'm doing is waiting to die or waiting to be alone again. when my friends tell me how much they love me, I just sit there and stare them in the eyes and I don't feel anything at all, all I say is 'i love you too even though I don't feel anything' I don't know what else to say I don't wanna be mean but its hard because I have to fake everything I feel, and exaggerate feelings in some situations, I wish I didn't have to do this, I wish I could connect with people and understand that they like me.
It sucks, but at the same time, it's not that bad (at least for me). I've been told by my therapist that I have SPD, and honestly, I'm not surprised at all, after learning what it is. For me, it's like all my emotions are just different shades of gray in a black and white image that is my life. Some days are nice, and I feel 'happy'; those are the lighter parts, and other times it's like someone took a dimmer and made everything darker. Good things aren't as good, and bad things are even worse.
I went skydiving, and it had been my dream for almost six years, and when I was done, I didn't feel excited. I didn't feel giddy. I wasn't happy. I honestly could've been turned away and felt about the same as I did after I jumped. My family was there, so of course I had to act excited. I smiled, I laughed, I told everyone that they should try it one day. But I didn't feel really anything. It was like, "Oh, okay. It's over."
When my little sister dislocated her elbow in a go-cart ...more
I do not know how in Gods name this is not higher on this list. I have suffered with this for about 4 years and all I can tell you is I equal it to living in hell. I believe it to be right next to Schizophrenia if not worse because nothing can help this disorder. Your entire perspective of life is totally changed. I don't even know what it feels like to feel normal or real because I have no memory of those times. Sometimes I wake up and look around and I cannot believe what I am seeing. I freak out and have a panic attack. This disorder has caused me 2-3 panic attacks a day. I feel like my heart constantly stops and I am always in fear for my life. Nothing helps and I believe I will be stuck like this forever.
I experience this 24/7 and it is the worst. Basically your life doesn't feel real. Everything around you is blurry and the colors are muted. I've had times in which I freaked out at random times bright lights makes this condition worse for me. My family doesn't understand what I have and they thought I was crazy, so I feel alone most of the time. The same thing happened to most of my friends. It changed my personality and I have lost so many of these "friends". In this madness, I found myself at home with Batman comics, so now I live in this world to try and get away from this agonaizing feeling of being alone with this disorder.
I have Anxiety, Autism, and Bipolar disorder but I find this horrifying. The best way I could describe it is living dead. Everyone with it experiences It differently but I have it to the point where it never gets better. It feels like I died a long time ago or I'm trapped in a dream. I lost all motivation and became apathetic. It cuts off my focus and concentration. It made me very suicidal and emotionless. I hurt the people close to me by not caring about them and ignoring them. It really sucks like every mental illness but I feel it's very hard to relate to if you don't have it.
This is by far the worst disorder I have experienced. I have severe anxiety and depression. One time at school I was doing nothing and was just daydreaming about the things I want to achieve in life. Instead of me fulfilling it at real life, I imagine having it in my mind. So I have this world that I created in my mind, which is very scary. This made me view my perception of reality in a very different way. I felt I was not in my body, I felt my body was distorted and wasn't 'right'. I was emotionally detached when talking to my family or friends, I lost lots of friends. Everything seemed 2 dimensional and blurry, my whole body gets numb. This just increased my anxiety more. I even have this 'out-of-body' experiences and I feel that I'm watching myself above and yeah... It's very scary. I have these episodes for like aost everyday and it's really distressing and it affects my relationship with my friends. Made me even feel more depressed because I thought I was 'crazy'. For me, this ...more