Top Ten Worst Types of People in the Movie Theater

The Top Ten
The spoiler

I could cry or punch someone if they spoil a movie for me. It's even worse when I spoil it for myself! Yeah, that's right - sometimes I spoil movies for myself.

You're watching the movie attentively, and then all of a sudden, "Pssst, he dies." You get mad but try to get over it, wondering who did it. Then, "Pssst, the doctor did it."

I saw this happen on an episode of Henry Danger like two episodes ago.

The talker

I went to watch Christopher Robin at the cinema, and there was an adult in the crowd who kept commenting. At first, it wasn't too bad, but the constant comments ruined the movie for many. I could tell people were getting annoyed. That's why I went to see it a second time.

Ok, I'm guilty of this on occasion, but I always keep the volume to a minimum. The worst, though, are the nerds or fans who yell and scream during big premieres like Endgame or Infinity War, disrupting everything.

The shusher

We get it. People should be quiet during the movie. But when your Karen-level shushing is louder than the people talking, you're actually more annoying to listen to.

When your shushing is even louder than the people talking.

Sh! HAHA (along with the rest of the theater) SHUSH!

The one who brings little kids to mature movies

PG-13! Hence the title! Parents who bring their kids under 13 to a PG-13 movie need to take more responsibility. If they are preteens nearing adolescence, I can understand, but bringing young children to an R-rated movie? Come on, people, have some common sense! I'm trying to be the voice of reason, guiding and teaching these parents the error of their ways.

It depends. Some kids are annoying, but others, like my cousin, stay quiet. I've always been quiet in PG-13 movies, but unfortunately, there are kids who are just loud and disruptive.

The person with so many snacks

I know, right? Especially when they keep crumpling their bags and making all that noise.

I don't like popcorn, so I put Doritos in a popcorn bag and suck on them to avoid chewing too loudly.

I admit I have been guilty of this too many times. I'm sorry, folks, I just love food!

The person who has to keep going the bathroom

I recommend you get your bladder checked. I don't want some weirdo walking in front of me all the time.

Especially when some whiny kids ask their mom to take them to the bathroom...

The emotional one

I don't like watching movies in theaters (because of talkers!). I prefer to watch them at home on my comfy couch. But if I do go to the theater, then this is me.

This is me. I'm the one bawling while everyone else just stares at me!

The one who cries even when the bad guy dies.

The tall person in front of you

I think people are misinterpreting this. I'm not discriminating against height. I just think it's annoying when someone tall sits in front of me since I am fairly short. Many of my friends are tall, and I don't hate all tall people.

What bothers me is when people are like, "You're so small, DERPPP." So, I hate those tall people, but not all tall people. Note that I said "way taller," so it doesn't necessarily mean they're tall in general.

For example, if you're 4 ft and the person in front of you is a 5 ft adult, they aren't necessarily "tall," but they're a foot taller than you, which makes it annoying when they sit in front of you. Also, they could be a kind person.

Lastly, how am I being a bigot? A bigot is someone who is intolerant of someone else's opinions. Whose opinion am I being intolerant of?

The singer

I would sing along, but I'm a terrible singer, and I realize that other people are there to watch the movie.

I remember seeing Mamma Mia, Rocketman, and Bohemian Rhapsody in the cinema. My sister knew all the songs.

This one totally applies to Frozen!
Q: How annoying is it when someone next to you sings along to songs in Frozen?
A: VERY.

The end of the movie clapper

When I was little, people clapped at the end of movies, and years later, they still did. No one who worked on the movie was there, so it's weird! People even clapped for bad movies!

People whistling at the end of the movie too...

The Newcomers

? The cougher
? The cusser
The Contenders
The constant laugher

About two months ago, my friends and I went to see Interstellar, and the movie was just about to start when two obviously drunk teenagers (a boy and a girl) walked in and sat down right in front of us. Now, keep in mind that this was a flat theater, and there were plenty of other seats they could have chosen.

They wouldn't stop laughing, even though there's nothing funny about Interstellar. Luckily, I had seen the movie before, so it didn't ruin my experience as much. Needless to say, if you want to laugh in a theater, don't go to a Christopher Nolan movie.

The complainer
The texter

At the beginning of every movie: "Please turn your mobile phones OFF."

Hey! That old lady told you to turn your phone off...

I am watching a movie! I don't wanna hear "bloop" every five seconds!

The farter

The next time I go to the movie theater, I'm bringing my own air freshener.

The loud eater

I always end up sitting next to the moron who chews their popcorn or slurps their soda so loudly that I just want to reach over and punch them in the face.

The crying child

First off, babies shouldn't be in the theater anyway, since they will cry whenever they need something. There's nothing wrong with a baby letting you know when they need something. It's the parents who are the problem. They bring their bundle of joy to a movie that has loud noises and scares the poor baby.

Second, kids who talk, kick chairs, run around, or do anything that's disrespectful and disturbs other people from enjoying the movie shouldn't be there unless they can respect others.

Third, annoying teenagers and people texting. The movie theater isn't where you go to hang out, chat, or check your social media. I'm a little more tolerant of kids talking a bit during the movie because they're still learning, but when older kids and adults, who should know better, do it anyway, that's more annoying than a kid or a baby.

People with phones should sit in the back and only have their phones on if someone needs to reach them in case of an emergency while they're there.

The excessively romantic couple

There was this couple kissing so much, and it was so cringy! I don't mind a little peck every once in a while, just don't overdo it!

The person who brings a dog
The loud child

Aw, where to start? These kids feel the need to be obnoxious little brats every time they go to watch a film. They constantly talk and chat when people are trying to enjoy the movie in peace and quiet. They are incredibly oblivious to how rude they are. We don't want to hear your conversation from multiple rows behind us.

For instance, if I'm in one of the front rows in the theater and you're sitting in one of the back rows, and I can still hear you, then you're being way too loud.

Furthermore, another annoying group that aggravates me are teenagers who feel the urge to text their mom, dad, or friend while the movie is playing. It clearly says before the film starts that all cell phones should be turned off, but apparently, they have no regard for being courteous and considerate of others. This is the second worst time to use your phone, right after texting while driving.

I know you're just minding your own business, but what if your phone rings in the middle of the movie's climax? People are trying to watch the most exciting part while attempting to block out the deafening sound of your phone ringing because you couldn't wait until the end of the movie.

Why do you even go to a movie theater if you're not going to pay attention? Just turn off your phone! Don't complicate things by being too stubborn and selfish to actually turn it off. Whatever it is, save it until after the movie ends. If it's an emergency, then walk out of the theater to handle it. We don't want to be part of your drama!

The gangster
The person who makes jokes during scary movies
The popcorn thrower

I would go up to them, dump my drink on their head, and then run away.

The people who keep criticizing tall people
The impatient kid

When they just walk in: "When's it gonna start? When's it gonna start?"
When the ads are on: "When's it gonna start? When's it gonna start?"
When the end credits roll: "When's it gonna start? When's it gonna start?"

The seat kicker
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