Top Ten Dumbest Things to Say Before Dying

The Top Ten

1 (A serial killer attacks you with a knife) Whoa! That's a cool knife!

And a knife made for you.

"Can I Feel the blade"

Can you get it closer to my eyes so I can admire the shine? (goes blind)

I wanna feel the blade with my chest!

2 (You fall from the top of a 25-Storey building) Yay! I'm a Superman!

This is so dumb but funny!

You are should be say this: I'M BATMAN! - 05yusuf09

Or you can say: "I believe I can fly"

You spelt story wrong

In British, Canadian and Australian English, it's spelt as storey. - Kiteretsunu

3 (You eat a deadly poison accidently) I didn't know this poison was sweet in taste.

I don't want to know what they taste like.

At least it tasted good

4 (You see a really big tornado just in front of you) Can you make me fly?

And sing the Christian song" I'll Fly Away" - funnyuser

You'll probably be killed by a flying car or a 2 by 4 before getting too close to that thing

Man you are awesome

No funny user,sing I believe I can fly

5 (You're in an airplane which is going to crash) So how much time will it take for the airplane to come down?

Really, why the delay? - Kiteretsunu

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Please make your way to your seat and fasten your seat belts; we'll be coming down in about 10 minutes."
"Uh... Make that 5 minutes."

We are getting very close to the forest...

Don't you have a watch dumbass?. - Nateawesomeness

6 (You're stuck inside a burning room) Awesome! Burn notice is on Netflix.

At least something interesting is happening around me! - Kiteretsunu

I don't get it:/ - Nateawesomeness

7 (A man points a gun at you and is about to shoot you) Will you let me borrow your gun after you're done shooting?

Laugh out loud! Funny humour, this! I liked the serial killer knife as well... God bless. - HezarioSeth

I don't know why you need the gun... But I guess you have your reasons, right?

This will confuse him - jmepa1234

Murderer: You're gonna die. Spit out your last wish. I'll surely do it for you.
Victim: I need the gun - Animefan12

8 (You meet a bear at a forest without a gun) Hey! Can you tell me how many teeth you have? Just for General Knowledge sake.

I voted for this just so I could say that lions don't live in forests. They live in Africa. No forests there. You can find a bear in a forest, though. - ChiefTumor

Don't forget your dentist license - Nateawesomeness

9 (You get death sentence at law court) Will I be allowed to pee at the day of my execution?

"You will automatically wet yourself at the sight of Old Sparky..." - Britgirl

Not if it's by electric chair. You know, for safety reasons. - PositronWildhawk

Instead of peeing,how about not dying,by running!, - Nateawesomeness

10 (Person stabs a knife into your stomach) Thank god! My doctor was telling me I needed more iron!

And it was on the day you needed your monthly iron infusion. - Merilille

And less blood... - Nateawesomeness

The Contenders

11 (A rattlesnake bites you) Ouch! Never mind!

Why waste my time on worrying about a snakebite? - Kiteretsunu

Yea,rattlesnakes are boring,let's find a fun thing like play hot potato with a hornets nest,wait,that's dumb to:( - Nateawesomeness

12 (At the hospital, dying) Lemme take my last selfie.

The person that added this shall tell us that they had added this! - funnyuser

Lemme say maybe not. By the way, thanks!

Who added this? Hilarious! - funnyuser

I KNOW this has happened.

13 (Jumping from the top of a collapsing building) Hold on guys... I'll get help.

Couldn't you jump lower, - Nateawesomeness

Super funny, person who posted this, You are a riot :D - Sasukes_Princess

14 (Gets hit by falling skyscraper) Cool! It shows my house!

That's not yo house biatch - Nateawesomeness

15 (A bull charging at you) My, what big horns you have!

Superb! Who added this? Brilliant! - Kiteretsunu

16 (About to be crushed to death) I always wanted to be paper
17 (Caught hypothermia) Elsa did it!
18 (Drowning) I think I can see Bikini Bottom

I hope the all Bikini Bottom is crying for you... - 05yusuf09

19 (About to be hanged) My neck hurts, will this make it feel better?
20 (Gets alcohol poisoning) I am the master of my domain
21 (Being crucified) Hey, this place has a great view!
22 (A shooting star is coming at your face) Pretty
23 (Chased by a swarm of bees) Wow, there's so much company today
24 (Trapped in a coffin) I think this belongs to Dracula
25 (Bleeding to death from the neck) Guys I'm a redneck!

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