Worst First Names for a Boy

The Top Ten

1 Gaylord

Come on poor kid has to fight for his life in the schoolyard daily.

I want to kill the father who named their son like that. Poor kid. This name should not be allowed

Ha! Poor freakshow! Someones going to get bullied. He should change his name

Why do people hate homosexuality so much? I'm gay but I devoted my life to God.

2 Dick

Um... I was going to say something funny, but some people might get offended. Don't worry, I have a funny name too.

HA HA HA Such a funny name who would name their son penis its the same as dick

Dont hurt yourself trying to think funny.

This name would suck for a last name too. And if your first name was harry and last name was dick. Put 2 and 2 together and yup that your name!

3 Satan

Satan... Ookayy...

Who named their kid satan anyway?

I would NEVER name my baby boy Satan.

Satan should be the worst because if you are christan he's litterly the evil spirit!

Because satan is bad

4 Abcde

-_-... Why the heck would you name your own son Abcde? I feel sorry for the boy... And now I feel like I want to Sing the alphabet...

I'm NOT JOKING! On the radio they said something about worst names and this guy called and said his friend was called ABCDE! By the way its pronounced A-Bes-i-ty. Sounds like obesity. Abcde is a bad name on SO many different levels

Someone must have made this name up as a joke and then people didn't get it and made it official...

My little sister's classmate is Abcde. I had to ask him so many times because I confessed I wasn't hearing his name right, until I asked him to spell it out.

5 Cannon

Be bad if you're last name was "Ball"... How would you feel?
I see nothing wrong with Ian or Colin though.

This is a joke. I think the parents were not ready to have a child and they wanted to blow him away through a cannon.

This is my name, childhood was miserable. But, I can ALWAYS get my name on any social network, or email, or website. I've always felt bad for people named John, it's like you say the name and 9 other people pop up. So lame.

I feel the same way about the name Alyssa as you do about the name John. My name is Alyssa, and from my experience at graduation Alyssa was by far the most common name. I wish I was named something less common.

I love the name. My brother is Cannon and he was named after a really great man. He was teased a lot in school, but who isn't... Kids can turn any name into an insult.

6 Adolf

This name should be number 2, right after Satan.

After the 2nd world war, no kid on earth ever got called Adolph anymore. If someone call his child like that, he shall not be surprised if people look at his son like he's the devil.

There's a guy on my bus nicknamed Hitler because he made constant Jew jokes. Just thought I'd share.

Actually Adolf isn't bad it's the Hitler part that's bad.

7 Ib

This is not a name! What a sad guy who would name his child this sounds like something you say when your bored. Seriously is anyone even called this!

That's a name? Wow. My mom is a daycare teacher and sometimes I volenteer there when I don't have school and I've heard some names like Wheeler and Hero It's so upsetting knowing these kids will live there entire lives with stupid names

Don't like it at all. Its too short and its sad how parents don't realize what they did. These kids deserve better proper names

Sounds like a sound a drowning kid would make

8 Elmo

Elmo?! The parents of this child must be seriously deranged.

elmo and barney should be 1 and 2 because those names are two of my least favorite cartoon's character

Take that back! Elmo was my favorite character from Sesame Street when I was younger not that I would name my child that. Anyways wouldn’t a worse name be Troom Troom?

I think they were getting ready for the baby so much that they watched too many cartoons...

9 Angus

The Angus burger comes from some of the best beef in the world, developed in Scotland... Aongheas (Gaelic spelling) is a very common name there, hence the name of the breed. A very ancient and proud name in Scotland.

Well, if your baby is fat, this is the one for you

The only Angus I know is from that Disney Channel show Ant Farm and he was a chubby, lazy computer geek who liked to eat. He couldn't even do one sit-up! Plus, this name also sounds like a huge burger you'd get from a fast food restaurant

The only positive outlook on this is Angus Young

10 Osama

Oh no, it's Osama! Let's kill him again!

It was pure unlucky that Osama (bin laden) was born and terrorized... Although anyone else I am fine with the name "Osama"

Thisis the worst name anybody could ever name a kid

The parents are just calling the bullies with a megaphone, "Here is Osama Bin Laden folks, step right up! "

The Contenders

11 Ian

I think that Ian is a hot name. I had a friend in my middle school named Ian and he was pretty cute. I don't think that Ian is a bad ugly name. Anyway when I have a son I am going to name it Ian.

Damn, he must of been the candles of a roasting fire in your opinion!

If I had a dog, I'd name it Ian, as a joke. Wolfgang is a beautiful name by comparison. Ian deserves to be at the top of this list. All those unfortunate Ians out there would at least be able to sleep at night knowing that they were at the top of a list for once. No offense intended

What are you talking about the meaning of the name Ian is "god is forgiving" not "it"! So Ian is a good name to have!

This is the most common name on this list by far. Ian Fleming created James Bond, and Ian Anderson lead Jethro Tull.

12 Wolfgang

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is the name of the famous composer

Sounds like a gangs of wolves and a baby of a person should be not named by this, your child will kill you

When I was in school we were learning about him and that's exactly what I was thought

Sounds like a bad kids'cartoon

Wolfgang is a cool name example : Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

13 Seaman

"Hey look, Tom Cruise has Seaman on his back! "

This is very similar to the name of my number one nemesis and adversary

Seaman... Like the dog on the Lewis and Clark expedition?

I would hate to be named Seaman.

14 Ashley

it's a girl name and people will mistake u as a tomboy instead of a boy

This is a girls name! HELO? Maybe that's Ash Ketchum's real name...

I love Ashley for a boy! Like Ashley Williams from the evil dead, he's a total badass and I'd totally name my future son after him

No I don't really think Ashley is a bad name for a boy. People think it's a girl's only name because mostly girls are called Ashley but I have a best friend called Ashley and he happens to be a boy. In the end the name Ashley is like Paris, we get Paris Hilton and we get Prince Paris from Paris and Helen

15 Shrek

You can't name your kid something like this and their siblings something normal like Jack or Billy

My brother is named Billy and he bullied me in middle school then he was bullied in high school.

My family loves shriek (sorry autocorrect problem) but I have grown out of my love of the movie.

Now paint the kid green! Laugh out loud for a Halloween costume

Yes there are people named Shrek. In my Grade 6 Camp, the manager was Shrek. And I thought he was Shrek the Ogre in disguise or something.

That names pretty ridiculous.

16 6IX9INE Daniel Hernandez, known by his stage name 6ix9ine, also known as Tekashi69 or simply Tekashi, is an American rapper.

6ix9ine is actually his nickname. His real name is David Hernandez.

Trash name and person

what the hell what kind of name is they


17 Camel

I'm going to name my kid this. And if I have another kid I am going to name them Cow.

While your at it name his twin donkey or horse

Camel more like mamel

ha ha

18 Joe

But my name is Joseph

This is not really a real name. It's a nickname for Joseph.

I think Joe is a great name! It is my brother's name

Joe is worst name

19 Pinocchio

If I was a little boy I'd barf if my name was Pinocchio. Would my Daddy have to be named Gepetto, too? Then there's the problem with crickets... I'm allergic to them even if they might be named "Jiminy" and can sing better than Rebecca Black. What a doosey.

At least you'd know when he lies to you.

Being named after a fictional character... Sad

Do people love the movie that much? If my son was named pinocchio he would be made of wood and say I'm a real boy

20 Chip

It smells like potato

My mom had a boyfriend named Chip. Whenever I hear her talk about him I always ask how Mrs. Potts is doing.

Chip the chipmunk! Where's Dale?

If anyone names a kid this perhaps a twin brother dale?

21 Poop

Poop, I mean, what is this, the first century? What kind of knucklehead would name their kid Poop? I guess when I write I will just start capitalizing it. Even though I never write Poop. But still who the barnacle would name their kid after somthing that emerges from your butt?!?! The parents might as well name their other kids pee, barf, and toilet. Now this is one jacked family...

That kid's parents are jerks.

Holy poop who names there kid this

I laughed way too hard at this

22 Nick

Yeah, experienced a horrid trauma from a nik...not a fan of the name anymore

Nick isn't such a bad name it's just so common that soon every boy will be named Nick and then when the teacher calls on Nick every boy will answer.

That's my cousins name!

It's so common, there are three or four Nicks in my classes, and the people in my classes are only a fourth of my grade.

23 Buster

When I first saw this I saw Bluestar X>
all you Warrior cat fans lol

Buster poesy

This is my dog's name


24 Hitler

Just imagine the history lessons

Even I hate that name and I'm German

Seriously, parents are really deranged if they name their child this.

Honestly it's like the parents want the poor kid's @$$ to get kicked!

25 Bart

Shiver me timbers matey!

Imagine if you were called this name and your last name was Simpson.

It sounded like somebody put fart Andy barf together.

This is the name of Impulse off of Young Justice and Bart is awesome!

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