Top Ten Worst Things to Hear After You Die

You're going to the afterlife. It could be heaven, it could be your digitised conscience, but it could really have unsettling terms and conditions. And you certainly don't want to hear these phrases as you move on after your death.

The Top Ten

1 This is Hell. You don't think that guy in the robe was crazy now, right?

Eternal death is worse than being in an eternal dark void forever. But I believe in God and that Jesus saved us, so we can all get to Heaven. May The Lord be with you. - ethanmeinster

2 There is no afterlife. Sorry we wasted your time.

Lol true I have looked up what happens after you die and a bunch of people tell their story of what it was like, NONE of them said they met God. it was just like a dreamless sleep or a black nothingness

This would feel degrading - Curti2594

This is more than likely what happens. - Joeflan

That would be a huge disappointment.

3 We can't upload your conscience to the network for the next six months due to server overload.

Slow computers. Don't you just hate them? - PositronWildhawk

4 We failed to forward your afterlife insurance to the since abandoned orphanage.

And, naturally, I'm thinking: "WHAT?!?! " - PositronWildhawk

Blast it! That's my dough you're talking' 'bout! - HezarioSeth

5 Why did you leave your wallet behind? You'll need that!

Thinking that you'd need your wallet in heaven kind of spoils the point, doesn't it? - PositronWildhawk

Well, you can't buy a house in heaven! - ethanmeinster

6 We can't confirm you're dead until we collapse each wave function.

Schrödinger's cat is pacing frantically in its box. Maybe. - PositronWildhawk

7 We're trying to recover your brain configuration, but will have to reassemble them after that blast first.

Devil says that to you. Your think about all of the things you did in life then he burns you! - timmytime

8 Are you watching your funeral? It's rather comical.

Haha! Look at that guy! 'He was such a noble person... ' Are they actually talking' 'bout me?! - HezarioSeth

Yeah, this is one thing I would not like to hear after I die.

Yeah thanks... How 'bout yours?

Question for Pos-hawk: why is your #10 the one I always end up voting for? This is hilarious! - Britgirl

9 Do you like AC/DC?

The music in hell would actually be Justin Bieber, Rebecca Black and Nicki Minaj - Adamshane1999

That would suck so hard. - Blue_Devereaux

They made the song "Highway to Hell". I get it. - Turkeyasylum

Its because ac dc was an demonic group

10 Oops. Hit delete. Please stand by.

The Contenders

11 Your life was just a dream

That's probably the worst.

I would cry forever untill I turn into ashs

12 Game over

You suck at life

13 *Nothing*

I think it would just be terrible to hear absolutely nothing.

Well, this website now knows my deepest fear. - keycha1n

14 Welcome to Hell, Please Don't Enjoy Your Stay.
15 To proceed to heaven, please pay two dollars

IT'S THAT E- Wait, where's my wallet! - Poptropica

16 I hope you have a nice afterlife
17 You're here as well?
18 What The Heck Are You Doing Here?!
19 Obama?! Why, it's a pleasure, didn't know your secret headquarters was here of all places

YES! The man who turned this promising country into a socialist hellhole and kept the troops in Afghanistnan. Now I at least know where he gets his ideas + motivation from.

20 Good, now that you died go make me a sandwich
21 *bark bark* my name is Cerberus, please contact my master if you have a fever
22 You will now be reincarnated into a criminal
23 You're a stupid hoe
24 You Need To Fill This Form For Heaven. *Looking At The Paper* Big Guy, What We Do? You're Unexpected.
25 This idiot never had a purpose. He should've died right before he was born
26 This dead guy sucks
27 He is weird
28 Hmm... Sorry we full! You can try hell instead?
29 Hmm... Sorry we are only allowed to let in 18+!
30 You were too young to die so we will send you to hell instead where there is no age limit.
31 We have full bookings! Sorry!
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