Top 10 Best Comebacks to Being Called Fat

So imagine you are a slightly overweight kid at school and some pimple faced kid comes up to you laughing and saying "Who ate all the pies? " What would your comeback be?

The Top Ten

1 I'm not fat, I just swell up because I'm allergic to idiots like you

Even though I don't really get called fat... this is one of the best comebacks I've ever heard.

Yo Dat is true

This is good for averything - Shreebalaji

This is a good one

V 14 Comments
2 I could easily say the same thing to your mother

But what if that somebody who called you fat was very ghetto and what if they were black

No not the mother. She didn't do anything wrong.

I think u need some karate classes before saying that just in case they try to fight u

Heh, hilarious!

V 2 Comments
3 I may be a bit overweight but you're ugly, and I can diet

Love this list laugh out loud! - moonwolf

4 At least I don't break a mirror when I look into it

Yo this works

This is just got to sting!

5 Be more original, idiot

It worked!

6 You better get your eyes tested because I ain't fat


This whole list is funny! - funnyuser

7 Bigger the better mate


8 I know, my weight is the equivalent to my IQ

Over 9,000! - BreakFastBeast2005

What if your weight is over 200? - TwilightKitsune

Laugh out loud! I'll tell my friend to use this sometimes.

This doesn't work for a fat fifth grader, say, because they would still be like high 90s, and the acerage IQ is 100

9 I love my six pack so much I protect it with a layer of fat

Nice I can totally use that one

Thanks the bullets gone now

10 Thank you for noticing

I'm not fat, but I do have meat on my bones. And, er, yes, thank you for noticing. I actually love being a curvy girl ;D - Britgirl

...Never pictured Britgirl saying this - QuarterGuysApprentice

I go for britgirl laugh out loud - 808swag

The Contenders

11 Because every time I bang your mom she gives me a cookie

Naw say there sister what if there mom is really old

Oh my gosh this will be my comment from now on

This is the best! - Fireboy

Love it can't wait to use it

12 Fat is Ordinary. Stupid is permanent


13 At least I can afford food unlike you.

Nice one this is great

14 I know my d*** is
15 I'm not fat, my abs are just anti social
16 I'm not fat I'm American

This is insulting to us Americans. I am actually really skinny. - RedTheGremlin

17 I Know You Are But What Am I?

A stupid comeback that babies use!

They could say "pumpkin pie"

Dumbest comeback ever...

Tgis is stupid

V 1 Comment
18 I may be fat but at least I am not stuck with a mother like yours

If you are fat, this would be perfect when unorthodox. - PositronWildhawk

19 I'm not fat, I'm fluffy

I love this.

This is something I would say if this happened! - Wolftail

20 You're gonna have a bad time

Sans:You're gonna have a bad time


21 At least I've stored enough when famine comes

...Lol! I'm not fat but dayyum, this is funny! - TwilightKitsune

22 I am pregnant.

This is ineffective - TwilightKitsune

23 You always talk about yourself



24 Well at least I don't break a mirror when I look in one

Mmm I'm using this 100%

25 I'm not fat I'm just allergic to them shoes

No insulting someones shoes is dumb stop it

26 Hey, your rib's sticking out!
27 Know the difference between fat and fun sized

Love it! - RoseWeasley

28 I may be fat but you're ugly. I can do something about it - you can't.
29 Quit calling me fat or I’m going to come over there and eat you!


Lol worked so well they almost ran

30 Hey it's chubby time!
31 Be grateful that I'm on Weight Watchers

So dumb that its funny

32 All the better to sit on my dear
33 Well look who's talking...
34 I may be fat, but you're a retard. I'll take fat over stupid.

This is sooo true!

35 Hey I'm not a mirror
36 Stop being so selfish
37 At least I ain't Dory the fish
38 I'm not fat I just swell with awesomeness
39 I'm just full of life
40 I’d rather be fat than be like you retard
41 I might be fat but at least I eat 3 meals a day



42 I'm not fat I'm cool
43 I'm not fat! I'm just big boned!
44 My middle finger gets a boner when I look at you
45 Wow, you just noticed!? Your weigh must be like your iq

I regret this

46 Why do you care about my size?
47 So cool right, I feel so safe, genius like you will never bug me.
48 Then you're obese
49 I'm not fat, I'm thicc
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List Stats

300 votes
49 listings
5 years, 66 days old

Top Remixes

1. I'm not fat, I just swell up because I'm allergic to idiots like you
2. I could easily say the same thing to your mother
3. I may be a bit overweight but you're ugly, and I can diet


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