Top Ten Ways to Annoy an American Southerner

The Top Ten
1 Correct their grammar

Oh, America, how I South could I do this to American wish all time the.

Grammar Nazis piss everybody off

I do this all the time.

2 Call them "rednecks"

Some of them would like it, because the term "Redneck" comes from the coal-miners Labor Union movement.
At the big political rallies of the day, those in favor of forming a coal-mine worker's Labor Union wore red bandanas around their necks, so that they were readily visible in the crowd.

3 Say that the North is better

I was planning to take a vacation in there before actually moving to the north and staying there for the rest of my life until death has come by(I might be in a different location). The south is no doubt an atrocious place to be in. The stereotype is actually true after all... I know, this is a comedy list...

Well it's true! The north is so much better! Education, food, air, cleanliness, cities, people, etc.

Well, the South definitely wins in food and hospitality, but the North is cool too.

4 Call them "Billy Bob Joe"
5 Hold up a sign promoting abortion

That's not a good idea in the land of Jesus fish symbols and religious billboards.

6 Tell them that NASCAR is not a sport

That would be very similar to telling somebody from California that surfing is not really a sport.

7 Call their cousin their "girlfriend"
8 Offer them only beer, fried chicken and watermelon

Don't forget to add country-sized desserts!

9 Ask if their mom is Carrie Underwood

Yeah, and my dad is Luke Bryan.

10 Tell them that the the state of Mississippi was named after a hippy's wife
The Contenders
11 Teach them about gun control.

The last school shooting in Britain was in Scotland Dunblane, in 1996.
There has been no school shootings in Britain since 1996
1996
1996
1996
1996
96
We do not have gun stores, we do not sell guns in supermarkets.
We do have knife crime but there has been crime with knifes forever its more heard on the news lately, there isn't going to be a school stabbing.

Guns are for sport.

12 Hit them with a banjo

Why would anyone want to be hit with a banjo in the first place! It would annoy me, and I live in the north!

That annoys everyone, doesn't it?

13 Talk in a fake Texan 'accent'

That would get old

14 Tell them their ancestor was from UK
15 Tell them the real Americans are the Natives.
16 Ask if they have more than 30 kids.
17 Teach them about fetus and abortion.
18 Teach them about evolution.
19 Tell them the republicans are for the upperclass.
20 Teach them the Bible is rather far-fetched
21 Tell them that eating contests is a stupid sport
22 Tell them outdoor toilets are outdated
23 Tell them the constitution is outdated
24 Ask if they are inbred.
25 Yell at them
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