Top Ten Things to Not Do at Church

The Top Ten

1 Watch porn and masturbate in the back row

This list is amazing

Who would do this?

He who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with his heart

2 Throw a beer bottle at the preacher

Then you'd be kicked out.

You're out after this

3 Unleash a hungry tiger onto the parishioners

How would you even do this?

4 Yell, "Hail Satan!"

All hail...DEMON BENDY! EVERYONE APPRECIATE HIS INKY SMILE AND HE SHALL RULE THIS CHURCH AND...AND...do cool stuff with it...

This is just stupid.

5 Play Cannibal Corpse Songs at maximum volume

The minister would hate it for sure.

6 Massacre the kids with a chainsaw

I think that's something Leatherface would do.

Holy crap! Who would do this?!

7 Yell, "Screw God!"

God is all powerful you know!

8 Go up to the elderly female song leader and perform Kim by Eminem

9 Flip everyone off

10 Run around naked

That's just illegal!

The Contenders

11 Have sex in the Bathroom

12 Suddenly break dance

13 Make out with a King Cobra

14 Shoot a lady in the head

Correction: Don't shoot anyone in the head.

15 Do drugs

16 Wet yourself

If your a baby, then this is perfectly fine.

17 Commit Suicide

18 Slam your head against a bible

If you were a kid then you would get pinched or hissed at

19 Skip across the room and sing, "let the bodies hit the floor"

20 Shout out "all of your prayers will never be answered!"

21 Spray paint an Inverted Pentagram on the Church Walls

22 Wear a Slayer T-Shirt inside the church

23 Molest the children

24 Steal a Bible

25 Set the church on fire

oh you'd get arrested after this, no one is entering New Birth Baptist Church anymore, so the construction workers have to demolish it, New Birth Baptist Church doesn't exist anymore.

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