Top Ten Things Your iPhone, Tablet, or Computer Should Do When Someone Tries to Hack It

It's 2016, a year for technology will evolve and improve. But if it's one thing too worry about, it's hackers...

It's a.new year, we should have a special security system for are devices. And I'm not talking about passwords. I'm talking about something that will threaten, scare, and annoy the hacker.

So without further more, let's begin this list.
The Top Ten
1 When someone tries to hack your device, your device will play "U can't touch this," by MC Hammer.

This list shouldn't exist. People can jailbreak their phones if they want to. It's the only way to play emulators (which is why Android is better; their app store actually has emulators)

So that's what the song means. Where can I download this security system?

Haha I love this idea

2 It threatens to show everyone in the world their internet history (even if it's been deleted).

This would be bad for anyone, yes even me. But I often regret the things I've seen on the internet.

3 A message pops up on the screen and it says "Smile buddy. You're on camera."

Should do that on talking angela

Does it really do that

4 It threatens to blow up if they try one more time.

You may lose an expensive device, but who cares?! There's a chance a hacker might get blown to pieces!

5 It threatens to give someone their credit card number.

I'm not sure how any of this would work, but this list is a joke anyway so might as well add random stuff anyways.

6 When they try to hack it, a message pops up on the screen and it says "It's best you sleep with one eye open from now on."

This is the one of the few items on this list you could probably do.

7 It takes a picture of their face so you know who was trying to hack your device.

Then again who wants some random strangers face on the device? Wait, I just made a comment pointing out the obvious. Oh well, everyone makes them now and then.

8 It programs a satellite to come crashing down on the hacker.
9 It brings up a jumpscare so scary that it makes the hacker crap his pants.
10 It threatens to play their least favorite song.
The Contenders
11 It plays the rickroll song, then explodes.
12 Spontaneous Combustion

For those who don't understand, that means "explosion".

13 It opens up 100 cmds on Windows
14 Taze them
15 Play Justin Bieber until the hacker turns himself in

Downloading Justin Bieber's songs should be treated like gun purchases. They are both equally dangerous

16 It sends ransomware to the device they used to hack your device
BAdd New Item