Top 10 Worst - But Funniest - Times to Fart
My mother would have a fit if she read this list, as ladies do not "guff." But sometimes it's going to come out whether you want it to or not.
When is the worst or funniest time to let it rip?
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During the Two Minutes' Silence
That would be screwed up. Then everybody would be laughing instead of being silent, and you might get in trouble.
This happened to my best friend! Laugh out loud.
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On a First Date
One day, you're walking with your girlfriend or boyfriend to a restaurant. You're at the restaurant already. You sit down. OH, GOSH NO, NOT NOW! *farts* Ahh, that feels better. Now, what were we talking about?
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In a Meeting
I always look around and give a disapproving stare to each and every one at the meeting.
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During Sex
Oh God! Don't go there! That would be insanely awkward!
That would completely kill the moment.
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In a Crowded Elevator
At least you could possibly not be identified as the one who farted.
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In a Taxi
The taxi smells bad enough, so we don't need any more disgusting scents in there!
Though it would be semi-funny and ironic if the taxi driver said, "What stinks?"
The thing about a taxi is that the air within it never escapes. So if this happened on a hot and stuffy day, you'd be in for a shock.
Verdict: gassed to death by a fart! Haha!
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While Giving Birth
There would be a rather breathless baby afterward. It would hold this grudge for a long time.
Disgusting! I can only imagine the sound.
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While Playing Twister
Haha! This would be awkward beyond belief! You get into some crazy positions.
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During a Yoga Class
Haha! Love this. All that stretching and bending. Anything could happen.
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In a Funeral
What if your fart wakes up the dead?
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?
During a Conference Meeting
Boss: So, does anyone have any plans to help our company?
It stays quiet in the room for a bit.
Loud, long fart.
Boss: I see... well... we had a productive meeting. Great job, everyone.
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?
While Someone is Grinding on You from Behind
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In a Lift
Only funny if it's YOU doing it. You look around at stunned faces and grin. "Yeah, it was me!" you proudly announce.
Ha ha, yeah, definitely worse than doing it on escalators. I did it once, and it smelled.
You should go in, fart, and then leave it for the next person coming in.
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While Getting Butt Implants
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When Being Tickled
I know who added this haha, and it would kind of ruin the moment. Thank you!
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As a Guest in Someone's House
When I was 2 years old, I was a guest at my aunt's house, and I farted there all the time!
This would be really bad. What if it was a meet-the-parents situation!
My best friend would LOVE that, I bet. Or maybe not...
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While Being Knighted
Yeah. That was me. You're welcome, Britgirl. And you're right, hilarious and awkward. I only hope the Queen has a sense of humor.
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While Getting Engaged
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While Pushing the Gas Pedal
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While the Priest is Giving a Speech in the Church
Try hard to keep your fart silent!
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At School
One time in first grade, a boy farted, and it was so smelly a girl got tissues for the other girls.
Happened to me millions of times! Once, one kid got a detention for farting.
Then, it starts a conversation between your entire class for 5 minutes.
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When You're on Stage
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Going Up Escalators
I think I was behind you, Dad, at the time this happened to me. You just have to keep going and hold your breath until you get to the top. The worst thing is, everyone behind you thinks you're the guilty one.
My father's guilty of this. Everybody couldn't escape the stench!
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At a Wedding
How is this not higher on the list? Farting in front of all your friends and family on the most important day of your life.
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Someone's Funeral
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When Your Mom is Giving You One of Those Very Long, Important Speeches
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Stealth Mission
Imagine someone about to rob a bank, but then, a really loud fart comes out! Farts save the day!