Best Things to Say After You FartLetting loose a massive duck call can be a mortifying experience, or it can be amazing. You just have to own it. And what better way to take control of the situation than to have that perfect one-liner ready to let rip.
The Top Ten
So they will not
If you are prone to farting, nobody will believe you - Solacress
*Farts loud in the middle of class* "All things must pass". - funnyuser
That's very funny
True avery on darts a raindow
It'd true I'm a unicorn sorry
, my family died from laughter!
My farts are very esoteric. It's not my fault that you can't understand their brilliance. Admittedly, I'm dumbfounded half the time myself.
Best one. Literally laughed loud in front of my entire family
And then everyone in earshot takes a big hopeful whiff.
No it smells like rotten eggs
Even Cookie Monster might notice.
That's nastyV 1 Comment
A very matter of fact excuse for why things are escaping from your bottom.
Summon you best Will Ferrell from Elf where he unleashes a righteous belch after chugging an entire 2 liter bottle of cola. Except this time don't count on the little kid sitting next to you to be smiling.
In regular show-
Mordecai: Did you hear that?
(Mordecai farts, Rigby clutches nose)
Rigby: Eeww.. Wait... I don't feel so good...
(Rigby faints and falls on ground)
In Regular Show-
Mordecai:dude did you hear that
(Mordecai farts, Rigby clutches nose)
I don't feel so good.. (Rigby faints)
Might result in a few blank stares, but sometime that is the risk of such exquisite high-brow humor.
Only for the most liquid of farts may you embarrass yourself with this. - PositronWildhawk
Liquid fart comes when we drink Coca-Cola - Animefan12
Lol I get this sadly only a certian percent of people will understand
Ha I love family guy
I hate meg swell
Of course, not applicable if you release a squeaker. Feel free to modify to fit the situation and speaker.
Classic Jim Carrey. Just make sure you can pull it off and that others are old enough to get the reference.
Ha ha! Best way to not getting yourself ridiculed! - Animefan12
Haha! I love this! It's just the matter-of-fact tone you use when everyone is staring at you, while their jaw drags on the floor. Very, very funny.
Love this list. - Britgirl
Fat Bastard from Goldmember. Make sure you have the monologue memorized, complete with accent, inflection, and timing. Once you start you have to finish. There wasn't enough space to add the entire thing so look it up. Gotta start with "It did sound a little wet" and end with "That, plus crap." If you don't have them rolling in the isles, either they have absolutely no sense of humor or you did it wrong because this is gold.
HA! Oh man, this, this is a classic. One of the best fart scenes in a movie ever, and if you can pull this off, you are AWESOME!
Who ever put this up. THANK YOU!
Guy at work did this. Holly was disgusted. - bobbythebrony
It's a very interesting choice. um. to be honest, I really just lmao
Thanks, you made me lol
See if you can get them to play out the whole scene. And if you don't know what scene I'm referring to you need to do a lot more research before trying to be funny. In order to be great, you have to learn from the greats.
We all know it's true! - MissingNo
Haha. I imagine someone letting out a huge fart and it shook the ground! - funnyuser
Then what'd happen to the butt? - Animefan12
More like eternal death
I think I'll need to use this excellent excuse a lot #if you know what I mean #i do a lot😝
My wife told me that the other day. I died😂
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4 years, 59 days old
2. All things must pass
3. WHO FARTED?