Worst Jokes Ever

booklover1

The Top Ten

1 I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

I can think of ten off the bat that are all far worse than anything on this list.

1) What did the board board say to the other board board... I am board!

2) Why did the chicken cross the road... It wanted to commit suicide!

3) What did the dog say to the cat at the bar... Woof!

4) What sound did the drug addicts's car make when starting up... Shroom!

5) What's worse than a worm in you're apple... The holocaust!

I'm laughing at this because of how generic it sounds. It sounds like something you would say in a normal conversation - Mcgillacuddy

Lol that is awesomely bad if you know what I mean - jmepa123

So bad it's funny - PeeledBanana

V 3 Comments
2 Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

This was kinda funny

I don't get it.

Lol

funny

3 How do you get a peanut to laugh? You crack it up.

So basically you have to torture it to make it laugh? - Mcgillacuddy

Wait so you need to murder it?

I'm not cracked up after reading this. - Alkadikce

I do not think it will laugh if you murder it-RVZ Sagaris

V 1 Comment
4 What is Santa's favourite pizza? One that's deep pan, crisp and even.

This is not even a joke - PrinceAntho

This makes no sense...

Good king wencenclas looked out on the feast of stephen, when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even. The last words to this Christmas song completes the joke

I don't get it. - Userguy44

V 2 Comments
5 Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

This isn't even a joke. It's a generic question with a generic answer that are both not even supposed to be humorous. I can change the animal to weasel and it still wouldn't make a difference. - Mcgillacuddy

This joke sucks, and should be. Number 1. To get to the other side? That's not a real joke. This isn't even funny.

Man, this joke sucks! To get to the other side? Really? This isn't a joke!

I get a migrane hearing that jokes

V 11 Comments
6 I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

That is a real cracker

Oh god

That joke is really good😜😇! Could the person who put the joke on the top tens make it make sense for young children?

7 Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

That is dreadful. Yet amusing. - PositronWildhawk

I can't stop laughing!

Cringy, but not bad

8 What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison.

Good morning to everyone except the creator of this joke

9 What kind of paper likes music? (W)rapping paper.

This is not too bad...

Rap music needs to die - ihatetrump

This is actually really funny. =^v^=

Wow... These jokes suck! I have a joke " why did the chicken cross the road! " that's all I have so far

Kidding

10 What did the tree put on it's salad?

crap - ihatetrump

The Contenders

11 What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live in the ground, except for the eagle.

This makes no sense at all. That's that they have in common?! REALLY?! COME ON PEOPLE, YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT!

This one is funny. I like it. =^v^=

It is not a propper joke but it is still really funny. =^v^ =

The mole gets paid better though. probably because it will put anything in its mouth. Eagle is picky.

12 *Insert bad joke here*

Okay, THIS one is KINDA amusing...

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

This was kinda funny

What's the bad joke? This is the joke.

V 8 Comments
13 Why was Santa's little helper feeling depressed? He had low elf-esteem.

I looked through all of these and this is the only one that actually made me cringe. Bravo.

14 What's grey and can't climb trees? Parking lots

What is also grey and can't climb trees, your imagination

I think there are a lot more grey things that can't climb trees than just parking lots. - Mcgillacuddy

That is so funny. Really, it is! =^v^=

15 Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the monkey falls out of the tree? Because it was attached to the cat.

Living creatures aren't "it" - ihatetrump

This one's just...sad.

Poor cat. - Userguy44

16 What does a cat say when you throw him off a boat?

Thought I smelled fish lol. My bad.

17 What's a specimen? An Italian astronaut

I like that one. Quite clever. - PositronWildhawk

18 Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot.

This actually cracked me up - PeeledBanana

This must be Part 2 to the chicken joke.

19 That was supposed to be an inside joke,
20 What do you get when you put a dandelion in the dryer?

What?

21 What weapon does a ghost use?

Itself

22 Bacon and eggs walk into a bar and order a beer, the bartender says sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.
23 What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick
24 What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.
25 Why did Fred eat the lamp?

LOL

26 Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Then how did sally get on

27 What is the opposite of Elfen Lied? Elfen Told The Truth.
28 How do you drown a Hipster? In the mainstream.
29 Did you hear about the man who bought a paper shop? It blew away.
30 Knock-Knock, "Who's There?" Not Sally
31 What do you call a cheese hater?
32 What does Santa call girls? Ho ho hoes!

This is a really stupid and sexist joke.

33 A man drives on the road. He overruns a dog and keeps driving. He overruns a cat and still keeps driving. Then he overruns a hungarian so decides to back the car up, go forward, back up again, go forward again...

Romanians have lots of hate jokes about Hungarians, this is one of the more gross ones. - Alkadikce

34 This guy walks into a bar and is a duck

Umm so what's the joke?

The joke is he's a duck so he's ducking th bar. I have no kill kms

35 A priest walked into a bar. Ouch! He said
36 What's grey? A melted penguin
37 What did one toilet say to the other?
38 Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke.

Why do people think crying sounds like boo hoo hoo?

39 What do you do when you make an unfinished jo...
40 I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.
41 What's brown and sticky? A stick
42 Why is this joke so cheesy? Because it has cheese in it!

Lol - Userguy44

43 What do you call someone who doesn't like you?
44 What's the song name? Darude - Sandstorm

It's so overused that it's annoying. - Userguy44

45 Come to the dark side, we have Loki, and cookies
46 How did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

amazing

47 What shoe do you put on first? Right, left one first.

This joke is just terrible. I found it on a popsicle stick lying in a parking lot.

48 I went to a refreshment bar at a zoo and asked for a White Cappuccino. The man got out a rifle and asked me to pick one.
49 Why is everyone afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.

Why does 6 hate 7? Because 7 "eight" 9.

50 What's an innuendo? An Italian suppository.

So that's what Queen got inspired by? - Userguy44

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List Stats

200 votes
75 listings
7 years, 293 days old

Top Remixes (9)

1. What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live in the ground, except for the eagle.
2. What's grey and can't climb trees? Parking lots
3. Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the monkey falls out of the tree? Because it was attached to the cat.
keycha1n
1. That was supposed to be an inside joke,
2. What did the tree put on it's salad?
3. What does a cat say when you throw him off a boat?
Merilille
1. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison.
2. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
3. What is Santa's favourite pizza? One that's deep pan, crisp and even.
RalphBob

WRemix
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