Best Chuck Norris Facts

oh my god, this is by far the funniest of them all... couldn't stop laughing!

Swim on land... That's the best one there is here! I love it! I guess physics just got crapped on.

by far the best nobody can do this but Chuck Norris... I'm still laughing man. Chuck Norris is the best, better than the Zohan

Chuck Norris is love, Chuck Norris is life

This fact REALLY made my day!
I laughed so hard as soon as I read it!
Chuck Norris FTW!

P.S. : Chuck Norris can strangle someone with a cordless phone... xD

Voters! Please get some sense of humor... This one should be at the TOP! Not down here! - Xion

TOO damn hilarious. This was the best fact ever created. So simple, yet so complex in it's true sentence. I probably just saw god... Okay no, not really. But this is better than any other, and some even get kinda... Blah? I guess, this never get's old.

Damn, that's so messed up

"Chuck Norrised"... Haha! Virtual bouquet of flowers to whoever came up with this one! Awesome. Oddly enough, I haven't come across this one before, but as so many have declared--this one is gold.

Haha. Chuck Norrised... Love it. This ones a keeper for sure. CHUCK NORRIS for the win Pure awesomeness here

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY HAS THIS IN IT! (YouTube)

For some reason I find this funny

I always wondered what he was hiding from but the answer is quite simple.

This one never fail to make me laugh It's really funny! I think this one should be on the top 3.

Yeah, it's funny because waldo is so wimpy looking. - masterblaster

Yep. - Metalhead1997

I love the added its a shame he never cried at the end. Laugh out loud This one is by far the funniest. I hadn't seen this one before but it rules.

I love this one! Its hilarious! (mike fizzle chisel has approved this message. )

Then the president of each country asks Chuck Norris to cut onions in a cancer hospital. He then got a Nobel prize. - Animefan12

lol - YOSHIA2121

all of these are great but this one is the best - moose4life19

I don't KNOW WHY THIS IS NUMBER 2 because ITS WAY BETTER THAN NUMBER 1!
ALSO WHERE IS DEATH ONCE HAD A NEAR CHUCK NORRIS EXPERIENCE! Laugh out loud

Laugh out loud this one is just so amazing. How can it be number four when it should be number one and then some with a side of chips well done and medium rare

MC Hammer said, "Can't touch this," and then did a silly dance. Chuck Norris said, "Watch me."

It's really only funny for those who have actually tried to delete the recycling bin.

This is just the best 1 out there! Props to whom ever made it up. How much trash do you have to write here to be able to Post?

This is so brilliant! The person who invented this is a genius. But not more of a genius than Chuck Norris. Definitely not... Who are you? NO! Please don't! I'm gonna -

I actually tried this once - TwilightKitsune

Well that is just really weird you know. I mean when I go to sleep the room is filled with boogiemen. I guess they chose to hide in my room. Laugh out loud

Well, everyone is afraid to be Chuck Norrised after all, but boogieman? Clever move chuck!

Hahaha undoubtably the funniest Norris joke ever, laughed just about every single time I have read it somewhere!

ha - YOSHIA2121

Simply laugh out loud... I laughed my butt off after hearing this one... Its simple and funny...

Simply the best, also the Jesus one is good

He won't tell us, though. I'm not saying he should. - Metalhead1997

ha

This is the best one I have ever heard. The other good ones made me chuckle but this one seriously made me burst out laughing. Please go look up braille if you don't know what it is!

Lmao I can't believe this one isn't in the top 5. Do yall even know what braille is? Lmao

He can also speak French, in Russian. He can hear sign language too.

Bump, space, space, space, bump, bump, space, bump, bump...You know. - Metalhead1997

AHAHAA that's just great, it says that he saw God and convinced him that HE doesn't exist!

For those of claiming that this joke is offensive to God/religion then your statement is also offensive to my religion of atheism

It's always funnier when everyone gets triggered.

PURE IRONY

Laugh out loud, most of the Chuck Norris jokes are quite repetitive but this one is just plain awesome. Good job to whoever made this up

THIS THE ONLY CHUCK NORRIS FACT I'VE HEARD THAT HAS MADE ME LAUGH!

I LOVE IT!

This one is HILARIOUS! Literally made me laugh out loud laugh out loud! Cannot believe it's not in the top ten!

It made me choke with laughter!

I cracked up the moment I heard this, in my opinion this is one of the best Norris jokes ever. - cyclone1248

That's so very true. Chuck Norris is always in control. - Kiteretsunu

SO AM I

yes - YOSHIA2121

Man this jokes is awesome.

Family guy! Made me smile

What I don't get it

They aren't jokes. They are facts! 😠

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$ made me laugh so much! @@@ I love this one so much! - Froggy

I heard that a snake bit him and then after awhile the snake died

Although this one is a classic, I love it. - Kiteretsunu

Chuck Norris once pulled apple juice out of a mango

This is so awesome. All you people don't know math to see how funny this is. (It is impossible to divide by zero)

He can. But he never revealed the answer. Otherwise mathematicians will lose their morale. - Kiteretsunu

Math must be really easy for him... Haha.. Maybe he can find the exact value of 'i', sqrt(-1)

what - YOSHIA2121

I imagine when he was doing pull-ups. Maybe the sky is drawn down below -laugh out loud-

Chuck Norris is the funniest guy I've ever met. The #11statement is absolutely true. I Wish I get a chance to meet Chuck Norris someday!

Imagining this makes me cry of laughter

true - YOSHIA2121

This is the most popular and the funniest... Simple and plain... Norris is a beast

This one isn't as good - YOSHIA2121

Who does he kill

I think it's really mean saying haB

Awesome! Imagine someone sleeping with their head on a gun and a pillow underneath! This one should have been rated way higher!

Simple but hilarious! The jokes that are only one sentence are always the most funny.