Best Chuck Norris Facts
The Top Ten
oh my god, this is by far the funniest of them all... couldn't stop laughing!
Swim on land... That's the best one there is here! I love it! I guess physics just got crapped on.
by far the best nobody can do this but Chuck Norris... I'm still laughing man. Chuck Norris is the best, better than the Zohan
lol - YOSHIA2121V 34 Comments
This fact REALLY made my day!
I laughed so hard as soon as I read it!
Chuck Norris FTW!
P.S. : Chuck Norris can strangle someone with a cordless phone... xD
Voters! Please get some sense of humor... This one should be at the TOP! Not down here! - Xion
TOO damn hilarious. This was the best fact ever created. So simple, yet so complex in it's true sentence. I probably just saw god... Okay no, not really. But this is better than any other, and some even get kinda... Blah? I guess, this never get's old.
Damn, I didn't even know it was POSSIBLE to have sex with islands! - Metalhead1997V 20 Comments
"Chuck Norrised"... Haha! Virtual bouquet of flowers to whoever came up with this one! Awesome. Oddly enough, I haven't come across this one before, but as so many have declared--this one is gold.
Haha. Chuck Norrised... Love it. This ones a keeper for sure. CHUCK NORRIS for the win Pure awesomeness here
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY HAS THIS IN IT! (YouTube)
In other words, the river dies. - Metalhead1997V 30 Comments
I always wondered what he was hiding from but the answer is quite simple.
This one never fail to make me laugh It's really funny! I think this one should be on the top 3.
Yeah, it's funny because waldo is so wimpy looking. - masterblaster
Yep. - Metalhead1997V 16 Comments
I love the added its a shame he never cried at the end. Laugh out loud This one is by far the funniest. I hadn't seen this one before but it rules.
I love this one! Its hilarious! (mike fizzle chisel has approved this message. )
Then the president of each country asks Chuck Norris to cut onions in a cancer hospital. He then got a Nobel prize. - Animefan12
lol - YOSHIA2121V 11 Comments
all of these are great but this one is the best - moose4life19
I don't KNOW WHY THIS IS NUMBER 2 because ITS WAY BETTER THAN NUMBER 1!
ALSO WHERE IS DEATH ONCE HAD A NEAR CHUCK NORRIS EXPERIENCE! Laugh out loud
Laugh out loud this one is just so amazing. How can it be number four when it should be number one and then some with a side of chips well done and medium rare
what - YOSHIA2121V 20 Comments
It's really only funny for those who have actually tried to delete the recycling bin.
This is just the best 1 out there! Props to whom ever made it up. How much trash do you have to write here to be able to Post?
This is so brilliant! The person who invented this is a genius. But not more of a genius than Chuck Norris. Definitely not... Who are you? NO! Please don't! I'm gonna -
I can delete the Recyling Bin - ShedopenV 13 Comments
Well that is just really weird you know. I mean when I go to sleep the room is filled with boogiemen. I guess they chose to hide in my room. Laugh out loud
Well, everyone is afraid to be Chuck Norrised after all, but boogieman? Clever move chuck!
Hahaha undoubtably the funniest Norris joke ever, laughed just about every single time I have read it somewhere!
ha - YOSHIA2121V 11 Comments
Simply laugh out loud... I laughed my butt off after hearing this one... Its simple and funny...
Simply the best, also the Jesus one is good
He won't tell us, though. I'm not saying he should. - Metalhead1997
i get it - YOSHIA2121V 6 Comments
Chuck Norris is very assertive with the way he acts, NOBODY can make fun of him even "natural phenomena" can't be a "smart ass" against Chuck.
.. Just brilliant; florence from Slovenia;
Best one in my opinion.
lol - YOSHIA2121V 6 Comments
This is the best one I have ever heard. The other good ones made me chuckle but this one seriously made me burst out laughing. Please go look up braille if you don't know what it is!
Lmao I can't believe this one isn't in the top 5. Do yall even know what braille is? Lmao
He can also speak French, in Russian. He can hear sign language too.
Bump, space, space, space, bump, bump, space, bump, bump...You know. - Metalhead1997V 6 Comments
AHAHAA that's just great, it says that he saw God and convinced him that HE doesn't exist!
Ironic. Chuck Norris HIMSELF is Christian, he simply can't do that!
For those of claiming that this joke is offensive to God/religion then your statement is also offensive to my religion of atheism
PURE IRONYV 15 Comments
Laugh out loud, most of the Chuck Norris jokes are quite repetitive but this one is just plain awesome. Good job to whoever made this up
THIS THE ONLY CHUCK NORRIS FACT I'VE HEARD THAT HAS MADE ME LAUGH!
I LOVE IT!
This one is HILARIOUS! Literally made me laugh out loud laugh out loud! Cannot believe it's not in the top ten!
ha - YOSHIA2121V 12 Comments
I cracked up the moment I heard this, in my opinion this is one of the best Norris jokes ever. - cyclone1248
That's so very true. Chuck Norris is always in control. - Kiteretsunu
If he presses w while typing will his internet browser close? - Harri666
yes - YOSHIA2121V 2 Comments
Man this jokes is awesome.
Family guy! Made me smile
What I don't get it
Kinda like the guys from ZZ Top hahahahahaha. It's true they don't have lower jaws
I love it when these facts can come up in intense debates. Nothing better than throwing someone off with some Chuck Norris!
A very good one indeed, it really reflects Chucks longevity, he's been roundhouse kicking dinosaurs into extinction
Oh my Gosh! This is made my day. So damn funny
And the dinosaurs failed his test. - Metalhead1997V 5 Comments
$ made me laugh so much! @@@ I love this one so much! - Froggy
I heard that a snake bit him and then after awhile the snake died
Although this one is a classic, I love it. - Kiteretsunu
what - YOSHIA2121V 5 Comments
I imagine when he was doing pull-ups. Maybe the sky is drawn down below -laugh out loud-
Chuck Norris is the funniest guy I've ever met. The #11statement is absolutely true. I Wish I get a chance to meet Chuck Norris someday!
Imagining this makes me cry of laughter
true - YOSHIA2121V 6 Comments
This is so awesome. All you people don't know math to see how funny this is. (It is impossible to divide by zero)
He can. But he never revealed the answer. Otherwise mathematicians will lose their morale. - Kiteretsunu
Math must be really easy for him... Haha.. Maybe he can find the exact value of 'i', sqrt(-1)
what - YOSHIA2121V 4 Comments
This is the most popular and the funniest... Simple and plain... Norris is a beast
This one isn't as good - YOSHIA2121
Who does he kill
I think it's really mean saying haB
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List StatsUpdated 24 May 2017
9 years, 252 days old
Top Remixes (33)
2. Chuck Norris got stabbed by a knife. After 2 weeks of pain the knife died.
3. Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
2. Chuck Norris Can Do a Wheelie On a Unicycle
3. All men are created equal. Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
2. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
3. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now just The Islands.
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