Top Ten Funniest Text Message Alerts

So many different text alerts. These are some I can remember because they made me laugh. Add some that you think would make great alert tones as well. Doesn't matter if they're made up. If you think it would sound funny, add it to the list.

The Top Ten

(In a posh English voice) Excuse me, sir, but I'm afraid someone is endeavouring to contact you telephonically. Shall I tell them to f*** off?

This should be an answerphone message. Imagine if your grandmother or the taxmen phoned you, and got this! Chortle!

Oh my god I love this one - IceFoxPlayz

Psss! Shhh! Listen. . . YOU'VE GOT MAIL!

I seriously want this one. Fabulous

Brilliant to hear in a library. Haha!

It's your wife. . . Again!
Hey someone has actually sent you a message. Pity you don't know how to answer!

This might be Nick Clegg's text tone.

Let my fart noise alert you to a text message
This is a sexy text message. Shall I read it out loud?

Haha I'd be like no no no NO Don't

Everyone will be listening for the message.

From Psycho: This is your Mother, Norman!
(Yoda) Ooh; message from the dark side, you have!

This actually used to be my text tone. I got rid of it after it went off in a big crowd near Hyde Park. So embarrassing.

Don't read this text message. It's another from your stalker
The Queen is on hold

Great way to draw attention

The Contenders

(Leonidas' voice) This is..... MESSAGE!!!
A voice: beep beep. Clunk, bang, plop, plop, ping. You just can't get the staff nowadays.
Your XXX delivery has arrived


Orgasm noises
Rakim yo ugly ahh got a message
The mail man's here
I love my man
You've got a text, but it's not from that girl. Sorry.

Or boy...
Lol I can already imagine my friends faces if they were to hear least, the two who know who I have a crush on...too bad I don't have his number...too bad I’m not friends with him either...too bad I always feel shy around him...😢"

Oh crap! It's your sister!
Let me out, I’m stuck in your pocket
(Rebecca Black style) Message, message, now you have a message. Everyone's looking forward to read it out loud!
Going to Ouija mode...
Someone says taco
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