Top Ten Things You Might Say to Describe Your Car, but Shouldn't Say About Your Girlfriend

The Top Ten

1 I have to fill her up regularly.

Ugh. And not to mention that she's burning precious fossil fuels as well. - SwagFlicks

YamI have to with gas,she thinks it smells bad - Nateawesomeness

2 If she stops working, just grab the hammer and give her another whack.

Why would you beat your girl like that?

I totally do this when she's lazing around and not making me a sandwich in the kitchen. - StephanTheIdiot

So you try to get your car into the kitchen just to make you sandwiches? Your house must be a mess. Someone should clean it... - PositronWildhawk

Don't ever try to do this neither on your girlfriend nor on your car... - 0744rose

Abuse always works! - Nateawesomeness

3 She's about a year old now.

Yup, our anniversary - Nateawesomeness

4 There's room for five in her.

Five mice - Nateawesomeness

5 She's a tad battered and scarred, but she does the job.

First time? - Nateawesomeness

6 The airbags could stop a charging rhino!

The meat is power - Nateawesomeness


7 Check out that rear!

It looks really cool, so much steel - Nateawesomeness

8 She's just been waxed, and she looks sexier than ever!

Just look at her shine! - Freestyle_Fujoshi

Looks so shiny! - Nateawesomeness

9 Selling her for half the price she was!

You're girlfriend shouldn't be treated like a prostitue.

We broke up - Nateawesomeness

10 I've had her for a couple of years now.

..."And now I want to trade her for a younger model." - Britgirl

Nice - 0744rose

The Contenders

11 She grips the surface well, even on tight bends.
12 Her tail is full of gas.
13 Bought her for nearly half a hundred thousand.

I think you can say this for your girlfriend - 0744rose

14 She's a real piece of crap.

How dare you say that to your car! - 3DG20

How dare you say that to your girlfriend! Rude. - funnyuser

15 I like everything, except the color.

If you say this, hookers will become useless to you afterwards. - Skullkid755

Oooh, that... that's wow - AnonymousChick

16 When I'm holding your wheel, all I hear is your gear.

Get it? - Userguy44


17 This is my bitch right here.

Hey! Why would a man call his girlfriend a bitch!? That's rude!

18 She's the best model yet!
19 She's huge!

That's a very mean way to describe your girlfriend like that.

20 I wish it weren't black

Mick Jagger might want it black. - Misfire

You can say that about the car, but don't say that to your girlfriend.

21 With my hand on your grease gun, MMM, it's like a disease, son

More lyrics of Rogah Taylah singing about cars. - Misfire

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