Top Ten Things You Might Say to Describe Your Car, but Shouldn't Say About Your Girlfriend

The Top Ten

If she stops working, just grab the hammer and give her another whack.

I care more about my car than everything else in the entire universe

I totally do this when she's lazing around and not making me a sandwich in the kitchen.

So you try to get your car into the kitchen just to make you sandwiches? Your house must be a mess. Someone should clean it... - PositronWildhawk

Don't ever try to do this neither on your girlfriend nor on your car...

Why would you beat your girl like that?

She's about a year old now.

Yup, our anniversary - Nateawesomeness

I have to fill her up regularly.

Ugh. And not to mention that she's burning precious fossil fuels as well. - SwagFlicks

YamI have to with gas,she thinks it smells bad - Nateawesomeness

There's room for five in her.

Five mice - Nateawesomeness

The airbags could stop a charging rhino!

The meat is power - Nateawesomeness


Selling her for half the price she was!

You're girlfriend shouldn't be treated like a prostitue.

We broke up - Nateawesomeness

She's just been waxed, and she looks sexier than ever!

Just look at her shine! - Freestyle_Fujoshi

Looks so shiny! - Nateawesomeness

Check out that rear!

It looks really cool, so much steel - Nateawesomeness

She's a tad battered and scarred, but she does the job.

First time? - Nateawesomeness

When I'm holding your wheel, all I hear is your gear.

Get it? - Userguy44


The Contenders

I've had her for a couple of years now.

..."And now I want to trade her for a younger model." - Britgirl

Nice - 0744rose

I wish it weren't black

You can say that about the car, but don't say that to your girlfriend.

Mick Jagger might want it black. - Misfire

Racist! - Oliversky

With my hand on your grease gun, MMM, it's like a disease, son

More lyrics of Rogah Taylah singing about cars. - Misfire

She grips the surface well, even on tight bends.
Her tail is full of gas.
Bought her for nearly half a hundred thousand.

I think you can say this for your girlfriend - 0744rose

She's a real piece of crap.

How dare you say that to your car! - 3DG20

How dare you say that to your girlfriend! Rude. - funnyuser

She's huge!

That's a very mean way to describe your girlfriend like that.

I like everything, except the color.

If you say this, hookers will become useless to you afterwards. - Skullkid755

Oooh, that... that's wow - AnonymousChick

This is my bitch right here.

Hey! Why would a man call his girlfriend a bitch!? That's rude!

She's the best model yet!
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